Picking Up the Pieces
by MoonlightGardenias
Summary: Post Time After Time. With her life spiraling out of control, Izzie needs someone there to pick her back up. Azzie.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: So I have now business starting a new story. I shouldn't even think about thinking about starting a new one. But here I am, in the process of wrapping up three different fics, and the reality of always needing something to write, something to break my block...I began this story. Because no matter how much the thought of Addex excites me, Azzie is and will always be important to me. Because it the midst of everything, Izzie needs someone to talk to...someone to connect with.**

**And Alex is it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, the show or it's affiliates. So, in short...don't sue.**

* * *

She had no idea what to do.

She had no idea what to do, and it scared her. It scared Izzie to realize that the world she had fought so hard to build back up around her had crumbled all so quickly.

There was George...which she knew with all of her mind what happened between them had been a mistake. She slept with her best friend, and with the looming reality that his marriage was on the brink caused Izzie even more guilt.

And then there was her daughter. Izzie knew it would happen...eventually. She had figured that by now her adoptive parents had informed her of the fact that she was indeed adopted, that she wasn't born of her "mother". Izzie hoped that her daughter, her Sarah as she thought of her...was okay. Was healthy. She didn't want to meet Hannah under the circumstances that she did.

What started out as a simple day at work turned into something huge, and sitting on the bench outside of Seattle Grace, Izzie Stevens tried hard to wrap her mind around the idea.

She had a daughter. She had a daughter that she could have known, she could have raised. Her daughter was sick. Her daughter was more than sick, Hannah had Leukemia. Tears welled in Izzie's eyes as the realization once again hit her. It hit even harder with the thought that Hannah didn't want to meet her.

Izzie had dreamed of the moment. She had planned out things she would say, things Hannah might say. Izzie had planned everything right down to the outfit she would wear and the pack of kleenex she would pack in her pocket. But she never, ever thought that she would again meet Hannah under the circumstances that were occuring.

The wind rising around her, Izzie knew she should return home. She knew that by now the fear was again beginning to rise in George, and by now Hannah's adoptive parents were in the hospital room with _her_ daughter explaining things about her sickness that Izzie could almost recite like a textbook. Still, there was some hope in the fact that she had helped her. Izzie had gone on the table to donate for her daughter, something she just knew was right.

Because screwing things up this time just wasn't an option.

Feeling a tear sliding down her cheek, Izzie fought to wipe it away before anyone saw. A white puff of tissue appeared before her, a hand reaching out.

"Thanks."Izzie said, gratefully taking it, without looking up. She knew thank you wasn't enough, because without knowing her, someone handed her a tissue in her time of need. Just the thouht of knowing someone cared made Izzie happy a small bit.

"You know you really shouldn't be sitting out here in the rain."Alex said, knowing that Izzie was upset.

"Alex?"Izzie said, surprise laced through her voice.

"Yeah. But don't let word about the fact that I carry those things around get out. I've got a reputation, you know."He said, sitting next to her on the bench.

"Cold?"Izzie asked, thinking it was the probable cause.

Alex nodded, laughing a little. "Yesterday morning I woke up...my head was on fire, and I couldn't breathe through my nose. But ya know..we all live."

Izzie laughed nervousily, fumbling with the kleenex in her hand. "Right."She knew that within the past few days, she had made more mistakes than even Alex Karev would understand, but in that moment, she was just glad to have someone to talk to. "Thanks...for the kleenex."She said, waving it at him.

"No problem."Alex replied, staring foward. "So is there a reason why you've been sitting out here for nearly twenty minutes?"

"I'm not sure if I wanna go home."She replied, wincing as she did. Because Izzie knew as soon as the words left her mouth that Alex would have questions as to why.

"Mer and Shep gettin' too loud for you?"

"Quite the opposite, actually."Izzie replied. She shook her head, trying to remove the thoughts. Bunching the kleenex up in her hand, Izzie drew in a deep breath. "I just think...that there may be a reason for me to stay here."

Alex looked around, then up at the lit up "Seattle Grace Hospital" sign. "Here...in the rain...in front of the hospital?"He asked.

"Not quite. Here...at the hospital. There's a..patient...that I'm worried about."

"The girl?"Alex asked.

Izzie's eyes widened, afraid for a moment that he knew. "How do you-"

"Someone saw you in pediatrics earlier...word gets around."

"Oh. And...?"

Alex shrugged. "Whoever she is, she must be important to you."

"She is."Izzie replied, her voice shaky. "But still...I should go. I can't-I can't get too attached, right?"

"Iz-"

"No. No, I know, Alex. I really do. I am back at the hospital and..."Izzie shrugged, tears brimming. "I am happy. But with all of this business of Mer almost dying, and then her mother died..and this mystery woman patient that you have been dealing with...and of course you have the added drama of the Meredith and Derek, Burke and Cristina, George and McDramaQueen combo...you've got a lot of emotions to deal with."

Alex was quiet for a moment, in thought. "Do you have plans tonight?"

"Alex-"Izzie began to say in protest.

"No, No...I just...Joe's is so close. And clearly you need to talk, or throw darts or play pool or something, right?"Alex asked, giving a smile. "And I am in a mood for a beer. It's the perfect match."

"I was..under the impression that you were hot on the trail of Doctor Mont...Addison."Izzie corrected.

"What?"Alex quickly replied. "Izzie, it's not...What I mean is-"Alex stopped, knowing he was nearing the point of awkwardness. "It's just two friends...goin' to hang out at a bar."

Izzie thought about it. She thought about the fact that Hannah and her adoptive parents were upstairs. She thought of the fact that George was laying somewhere with Callie, praying that the guilt wasn't evident on his face. Izzie thought of the fact that for once, Alex was talking to her without sarcasm, without a smirk or a cocky attitude. In a way, she missed that side of Alex.

Offering a smile, Izzie just wanted an hour to where her troubles would be pushed back. To where, for once, she could feel in control. A game of darts. Ordering a drink. It seemed simple enough. Alex wasn't one for emotional, secret-revealing conversation, so Izzie felt that she would be safe. "Okay."She replied. "I'll go."


	2. It's not that simple

**Author's Note: Thank you so muc for reviews! I have to agree, there just do not seem to be that many Lexzie/Azzie fics out there anymore. I'll be honest and say that I support the Gizzie relationship-but ONLY as friends. I don't want something like what happened between Mer and George to happen there, because he has always been her _brother_--Exactly why they won't last. **

**Alex on the other hand..he has alway had a soft spot for Iz. And it's about time he realized it.**

**Disclaimer: No, I don't own. Oh, what a life it would be if I did...**

* * *

Izzie stared down at the bar counter, counting in her head the number of times she heard her nails click against the wooden surface. She focused of the sound of the door opening and shutting, an even number of times. By now Alex and herself were stressed from work, so for nearly ten minutes neither said a word.

"Twenty-nine."Alex's voice came, breaking the silence.

"What?"Izzie asked, her head turning towards his. She was almost surprised to see the look of concern in his eyes.

Holding his glass in the air, Alex firmly shook his head. "You're nervous. So you're tapping on the counter. Twenty-nine times."

Fighting back a laugh, Izzie downed a shot. Shoving the glass back towards Joe, she signaled that she wanted more. "I had no idea that you were that obsessed."

"Obsessed?"Alex asked, concerned. He wasn't trying to make it seem that way at all. There was a look evident in Izzie's eyes that something very stressing, very painful was happening to her, and whether Alex liked it or not, he found himself wishing that he could be the one to make it better. "I'm just trying to help."

"As always."Izzie replied, taking her glass back from Joe. Tracing the rim with her pointer finger, she stared into the liquid. "Do you ever feel like you're stuck?...Between things? Like one side is right, but the other side...it's right, too?"Izzie said, finding it somewhat more easy to have the conversation with him in a public place.

"What do you mean?"

"Like...everyone is watching you, studying you, worried...worried that you'll mess up. That you'll screw up. No matter how hard you try, no matter how badly you...you believe that you're doing the right thing, something happens. Something...changes. And you're forced to change with it."

Alex slowly drew in a breath, worried that Izzie would break down. It was clear by now that for some reason she was actually willing to talk to him, and he wasn't about to ruin that chance. "Iz...everyone knows you've been through a lot in the past year. I know that there have been naysayers, but trust me...there are tons of people rooting for you."

"Thank you, Alex."Izzie replied, offering a sad smile.

"Do you-"Alex paused, unsure of what her answer would be. "Something is obviously bothering you, Iz. We're...friends."

"Friends?"

"Friends."Alex replied, taking a gulp from his glass. "You can tell me."

Izzie let out a laugh, a smirk playing on her lips. "I just wish it were that easy."

"It could be."Alex said, studying her. Something about this, something about her-it just didn't mesh. Izzie was emotional, Alex knew that much. But tonight..now...something was different. Something felt different. "Something...something happened at work today. You-You disappeared."

"Yeah."Izzie replied, slightly hesitant. "What's it to you?"

Alex shrugged. "I didn't say it was anything to me. I just thought that maybe it had something to do with why you're so upset."

Slamming her glass down on the bar, Izzie swallowed hardly. "It doesn't...darts?"

He had hit a nerve. Alex had touched on the reason Izzie was acting the way she was, and at that moment, he wasn't sure if he should continue with questions. "Okay."

Izzie handed him a few darts carefully. Turning towards the board, she took in a breath, almost as if she were trying to concentrate. Releasing the dart from her hand, it landed on the board, a mere inch out of the bullseye.

"Close."

"But no cookie."

Alex laughed at the sarcasm, stepping up next to her. "Focus is key."

"I've heard that before."She answered.

"Maybe because you're a surgeon."

Izzie absently chewed her lip, throwing her second dart. This time, it landed closer, but still failed to hit the center.

"Getting better."Alex said, smiling. He was amused with the fact that at the same time Izzie seemed to be worried and stressed, she could seem cute while playing a game of darts. "Mind if I go?"

"Be my guest."Izzie said, stepping back to allow him room. "Maybe you'll have greater luck."

"Maybe."He replied. "I used to play sometimes. I had a board in my room back in college."

Izzie watched as Alex threw the dart. She found herself studying his face, amused at how he seemed to be so deep in concentration, and yet at the same time, she knew he was only offering a distraction. "Close..."She replied, walking closer to him. "But...no cookie."

Alex shook his head, walking back to the bar to take another drink. Setting his glass back down, her glanced over at Izzie. Her elbows were propped on the counter, fingers numbly messing with the fraying ends of her ponytail. Her lips were mumbling a little, almost as if she were praying. He frowned, confused. "Ready to try again?"He asked, afraid Izzie would catch him staring.

"Of course."Izzie replied, focusing her stance again.

"Now remember, the key is-"

"Alex, seriously."Izzie cut him off. She instantly felt guilty, but she had to admit that it had been bugging her. "I know how to play darts, okay? I-"Izzie paused, lowering her arm to her side. "I'm sorry."

"No. It's okay, really."Alex said, shrugging it off. He knew he shouldn't have come off as 'babying' as he had been. "Just trying to help."

Izzie nodded, feeling tears filter into her eyes. "I just-I mean, it's been so much. So...So hectic today, you know? And I just wanted to forget it. Just for a little while. I wanted to come to Joe's with you...play a game of darts...forget that I'm a surgeon who deals with life and death drama everyday. Sometimes it gets to me."

Standing firm, Alex thought about moving closer, but her knew otherwise. "I understand. Jane Doe...we...still don't have her family. This couple came in today swearing up and down she was their daughter. But then the mom-"Alex stopped, wondering why he was telling her all of this. "Well, a mother knows, I guess. It wasn't their daughter."

Blinking back the tears, Izzie knew Alex had seen them. "A mother knows best."Izzie choked. If a mother knew, then why was it so hard for her to decide? She was a doctor, which meant that she could go places in the hospital that others couldn't. She could see results, witness things, talk to people. It was enough at times to make people lose themselves in the power. And yet Izzie knew better. Hannah, her own daughter, didn't want to see her. And while the thought made her heart ache with fear, with longing to just look into her daughter's eyes and explain, Izzie knew she couldn't. "I should go home. It's getting late."

"Go home? Already, Iz...It's only-"

"I know, I know."She replied. "But it's late, and I'm tired. And I have a patient...the girl...who-"Izzie nodded, choosing the words carefully as she went along. "Who needs me tomorrow. I have to go."She said, making the decision. She would wait the morning through. If Hannah didn't request to see her, then she would go up again on her lunch break in hopes of hearing the word 'yes'. Because somehow she felt that by then she would be ready.

Offering a smile, Izzie pulled her purse off of the stool. Finishing off the final shot Joe had given her, Izzie set the glass back on the bar with a sigh. "Thanks for a great time, Alex. I'm sorry I wasn't a better date."

"It wasn't a date."

"Exactly. But you said it..we're friends. I owe you something, right?"

Alex shrugged. "You can make it up to me."

Shaking her head as she walked away, Izzie laughed to cover the pain. "I can only imagine how."

"Well-"Alex said, leaning against the bar. He was taking a gamble, taking a chance that he knew he really shouldn't. But curiousity bit him, and Alex just had to know. "You could tell me who she is."

Izzie froze, slowly turning around. She didn't want to believe it. She wanted to blame it on the crowd, on the music...on something than Alex actually saying the words. "What?...Who?"Izzie asked.

He felt guilt-a pang in his gut. Maybe he was right. Maybe she had meant something to Izzie. But it wasn't possible, and knowing how attached Izzie got to her patients, Alex figured that talking about it would help. "The girl...in pediatrics. Did something happen to her? Is that why you're so upset?"

Furiously shaking her head, Izzie stood firm. "No. That is not it. It has nothing to do with her, Alex why would would you-why would you say that?"

"I don't know, Iz. I mean, I just thought-"

"Exactly. You just thought."Izzie replied, her bottom lip trembling. She could tell that her words had upset him, that she had caused Alex to have even more suspicion. But she had to cover her tracks, they couldn't know. Izzie knew that she had enough trouble as it was without the added pressure of people knowing that she had a daughter who had Leukemia. As the door jingled, Izzie could hear the sound of thunder echoing in from outside. "I better go. Before the storm gets much worse. Thanks, Alex...have a nice night."

Alex stared, part puzzled, part confused, at the spot Izzie vacated. "You, too, Izzie. See ya...at work." He stared at her back leaving the door, confused as she left. What happened? He didn't mean to upset her. In truth, Alex invited Izzie to Joe's to do the exact opposite. He missed her, and he was only trying to make her feel better.

"Hey, man-"Joe said, wiping down the counter. "Whatever is bothering her...it's obvious you still care. In time, Iz'll notice. She's a tough one, Alex. She'll pull through."

Alex couldn't help but laugh. Because he knew that Joe was right, and he just hoped that, in time, Izzie would see it, too.


	3. Something's gotta give

**Author's Note: So there really wasn't much Alex and Izzie interaction in the last episode, and when there was it was about Meredith. But still, they have a connection-a strong one at that. Still though, it's been two episodes, and no mention of Hannah...is she even still at the hospital, or did they bring her in just so Izzie would know things would be okay? Because really...**

* * *

Izzie shut her locker door, turning to see Meredith and Cristina seemingly deep in conversation. Pulling her hair back into a ponytail, she hoped that she looked composed. The night before, after she left Alex at the bar, Izzie went home, baking cookies until two in the morning followed by sleep that was continuously interrupted, just about once every hour. 

"Iz?"Meredith called, pulled her shoes on. "You okay?"

"Huh?"Izzie asked, surprised. "Oh, um...yeah. Just fine. Good. Great."She bit her lip silently, thinking that the overly perkiness would be an obvious sign that she wasn't. As George walked around the corner, she felt her demeanor change. "Shouldn't we get moving? I mean, Bailey will be here any minute and-"

"And exactly what does that mean?...Izzie, we wait here. It's what we do."Cristina said, noting her behavior.

She caught Alex studying her out of the corner of her eye, but pretended not to notice.

Bailey opened the door, ready to go as usual. "Okay interns, we have patients to take care of...places to go, people to heal. Yang-you're with Torres. Karev and O'Malley, you'll be with Shepherd-he's got surgery in an hour, by the way, so be prepared. Grey, you're with Burke, and Stevens, pit-"She held up her hands, knowing Izzie would try to interject. "There is a virus going around and people are having trouble breathing, people with allergies and cuts...everybody, scoot!"

Just as Izzie attempted to make her way past, Bailey caught her arm. "What's going on?"

"You know what's going on, Stevens. How are you holding up with this?"

"Well, I would be doing better if I could actually get in to see Hannah, but I guess it's clear that won't happen. So-"Izzie said, taking a deep breath. She flashed Bailey a smile shrugging, "I'm doing my job."

"Good, okay. And listen, Izzie...I put you on pit as a precaution, and I'll be working the clinic, so if you need-"

"I'm fine."She insisted. "I've gotta get to work."

* * *

She wasn't sure how long she had been standing there, in the hallway on the pediatric floor. Her hands were curled into balls, her fingers grasping the ends of her sleeves. Taking an even breath in and out, Izzie slowly began shaking her head. Looking at her watch, Izzie knew it was time. She had to leave, had to get back to work. Because she was sure that if she didn't, one of the nurses would probably report her, just standing there.-If they already hadn't.

* * *

"Hey-"Alex said, pulling off his scrub cap. 

George turned around, expectant. "Yeah?"

Alex, slightly surprised that George had even shown him any attention, shuffled his feet in an attenpt to find something to say. He wanted to talk about Izzie, about the awkward silence when he walked in the locker room, but he knew that couldn't be the opener. "Kind of tense in there, huh?"

George turned , washing his hands. "Yeah, it was. The guy nearly passed...but Shepherd..."

Alex nodded, grabbing the soap from him. "He may be an ass to Mer sometimes, but he's a great surgeon."

Nodding, George went about washing his hands. "So uh...anything else?"He asked after he was done, noticing how Alex was standing.

"Hmm? No, No..."He moved towards the sink, watching George dry with a towel over his shoulder. "So hey, I noticed things got a little tense this morning...anything wrong?"

"Why would you think that?"George asked, almost dreading the conversation. "Everything is good. Fine."

"Okay Izzie."Alex muttered under his breath.

"What?"

"Nothing, but seriously...if you're actually fine, say something other than what Izzie would normally say when she's not..."

George twitched, recoiling. Shrugging, he let out a laugh. "I've gotta go meet Callie for lunch..."He said, pushing past.

* * *

Izzie stared down at a wilting turkey sandwich trying to find the strength to eat it. In truth, it didn't look at all appetizing, but the growling of her stomach told her that she should at least attempt to eat. Reaching for her water bottle, she saw Meredith sit across from her. "Hey."

"Hey."Meredith replied, seemingly out of breath.

"What's wrong?"

Meredith shrugged, unwrapping her sandwich. "Fine. Just...our, um...our patient this morning kind of-"

"Oh."Izzie said. "I'm sorry."

"No, it's okay, I guess. But it was a girl...a little girl. I guess that's the part that made it so sad."Meredith said, with no clue that Izzie would ever be affected.

Izzie's heart silently dropped, her sandwich halfway to her mouth. "A little girl?"She asked, fear laced through her voice. She thought of Hannah, of the small glimpse of her she had gotten sitting in the hospital bed. While Izzie knew that it wasn't-that it couldn't be her, a fear inside of her latched on, determined not to let go.

Meredith eyed her, frowning. "Yeah, it was a complication with her system."She paused, taking a bite of her food. "So how's your day?"She asked, curious.

"It's been...interesting. I guess."

Just as Meredeith was about to reply, her pager began to beep. "Oh...sorry-"She muttered. "I have to go..."Finishing her bottle of water, Meredith apoligized again, and then headed for wherever it was she was going.

Izzie, feeling more defeated than she had before, shoved her plate further away. She was suddenly feeling the immense need to sleep, or to at least breathe in air that didn't smell like lemon cleaner and antiseptic.

* * *

"Doctor Shepherd-"Alex said, spotting him at the nurses' station. "I got the results back for the patient in 2021 There's a problem with the-"

Derek took the file from him, examining the results. "Well, this is interesting. Schedule a CT scan, and try and make it quick."

Alex nodded, spotting Izzie on her way out the door. "Right away."Alex said, walking to the elevator. As he was waiting, he leaned to look out the glass, and saw her standing on the walkway, running her hands through her hair. Convinced that something was indeed wrong, he headed up to CT, vowing to go back out to see what was wrong.

Standing by the doors, he could see her shaking her head, wiping away at what he knew were tears. Debating on wether or not he should just go over, Alex wished she could just tell him what was happening. He wanted to be there more than he had expected. It was a thought that surprised even him. "Izzie."

Startled, Izzie straightened, looking out at the parking lot. "Alex...hey."She said, trying to act as if nothing had happened. Her hair picked up with the breeze, adjusting itself against her shoulders. "So why are you out here?"She asked.

"Because I saw you, and I thought that I could come out here. You were acting kind of wierd this morning, so I assumed something was wrong."Alex paused, watching how Izzie reacted.

"I'm fine."Izzie replied numbly, arms crossed. She hated it. The irony of it all. There was Hannah, her daughter. The one she thought she would never see again. And then there was George, her best friend. _Former_ best friend, Izzie corrected herself. While she tried to ignore the fact that she saw him with Callie at lunch, and the fact that she caught them both looking at her several times, she felt herself being pulled to a bench.

Alex sighed, his hand on her shoulder. "Izzie. I know that I probably crossed a line last night by asking you to go into detail. I know that there are-"He said, shrugging. "-And probably always will be a place in your heart that won't be filled. You're trying to get over that, and...it's okay."

"Is it really? Is everything really okay? Because everyone keeps saying that it is, but they have no idea. They have no idea how fast things can just fall apart like that."Izzie spilled out. She looked over at Alex who was sitting next to her and stood. "I'm sorry, I should get back inside. I've gotta get back to the pit-"

"Izzie-"Alex said, standing with her. He reached out for her arm, determined to let her know that there was at least someone there. "What is going on?"

Between Alex looking at her the way he was, and offering what he was offering, Izzie couldn't take it any more. She felt like she was tearing at the seams, and if she kept it all in, she wouldn't be able to control it any longer. Letting out a sob, she shook her head. "It just doesn't make sense, you know? How one minute everything is just fine, and then the next your whole life changes? I-I have...I had a daughter. A girl named Hannah...and I gave her away for adoption, because I thought it was the best thing to do. I thought that by giving her away, she would have a better life. She would get all the oppurtunities that I didn't."Izzie said, clapping her hands against her legs loudly. "And now she's here. At the hospital...she has Leukemia, and I...I donated Bone Marrow. It was the least I could do but-"

Alex watched her, both surprised and concerned. Still, he felt that Izzie being Izzie, she needed to finish the story.

"She won't see me. I mean, I know I gave her away. I know I...let her go when she was...not even an hour old. But now she's here. Suddenly...back in my life. I guess I always knew it would happen. One day."She said, surprisingly finding telling Alex what she was as releasing. "But now? I mean, she's..she's eleven. Or so, and..."

"And it'll be okay, Izzie. Give her time-"Alex said, trying to console her.

"But that's not even it. George won't talk to me because of one big, stupid mistake. One big, huge mistake that I will end up regretting...forever. We got drunk. We...slept...together...and now the one person who never hurt me, or who I never hurt...is gone. He's gone, Alex. He will probably never talk to me again. And I just...I just-"Izzie stopped, in a fit of tears. She felt ger knees buckle underneath her, but as she did she felt Alex catch her.

He wasn't sure of why or how, but Alex knew that it was the right thing to do. Despite the people walking by, or the fact that it had slowly began to rain around them. "Izzie..."Alex muttered, finding even saying her name hard. Because he knew that he was on that list, that he had hurt her once. More than once. "Everything is gonna be okay. You have to believe that. You have to...have to let people be here for you."

Relaxing against the warmth of Alex's neck, Izzie nodded, muffling the sound of her 'thank you'. She hadn't felt safer in a while, and Izzie couldn't help but think that she wanted it to last.

"Do you want to see her?"Alex asked.

"What?"Izzie asked, slowly lifting her head from his shoulder. "How could-"

"Just...do you?"


	4. Knocking down the door

**Author's Note: Well, the season is over, though not as I expected it. Where is Hannah exactly? It's like they brought her in for a few episodes, and then just let her disappear. You have to know that she didn't just go away, right? Anyway, I wanted to get this up as soo as I could. I'm sorry for not updating sooner. I've had exams, and various projects. However, i'm done now. I've got free time to write again, and I'd like to focus on this story.**

* * *

Izzie stared at the closed hospital door, trying her best to just breathe in and out. Her daughter was on the other side of the door, and all she could think about was that she had no idea what to say. Blank-her mind was blank. Eleven years had passed since she gave birth...since Hannah was taken out of her arms. And all she could think about was the fact that her daughter was stricken with Leukemia. "I can't do this."She said, staring atraight ahead. "Alex, we should go. I shouldn't be here."

"Iz-"Alex protested.

"No. No, I know...I know that you want to help me. That you want to help get me through this. But Alex-"Izzie said, tears in her eyes. She wanted it to be over. She wanted everything to be fine, to just pick up the pieces and move on. Instead, Izzie felt stuck. "I can't go in there. I can't talk to her."

Alex rested his hands on her shoulders, taking a deep breath. "What if she wants to talk to you? She knows who you are, Izzie. She knows that you're her mother, that you're the one who gave her up-"

"Which is exactly why I can't go in there!"She exclaimed. "I didn't expect it to be this hard, you know? I mean, I knew eventually I would have to face her. I thought I was ready, but I'm not."

It hurt him to see how scared she was. While Alex knew that things between him and Izzie weren't exactly on a smooth level, but he thought that doing this-helping her take that step-would make things a little better. "Hey-"He said, squeezing her shoulder. "It'll be okay. I mean sure, it'll be hard. But you...you're Izzie. Everyone loves you."

"Callie sure doesn't."Izzie muttered, shaking her head. "Look, I can't drag you further into this. Okay? I donated marrow to Hannah. I-"She searched for an excuse, something to prove that she had already tried. "Just..please don't tell anyone. About Hannah or George. It was a mistake."

Alex nodded in agreement. "I won't tell anyone. But eventually you'll have to."

"I know."Izzie replied. "Could you just stay here? I...I do want to go in. I just-I wanna see her."

"I'll be right out here."

Izzie nodded, knocking on the door as a signal to her parents. When they approached the door, they asked her if she was ready. They asked Hannah if she wanted to. Then, they nodded, walking out into the hall to join Alex.

* * *

It seemed like a dream. She watched, studying Hannah as she sat in her bed, trying her best to color a picture. She looked tired, weak. Purple circles under her eyes revealed the fatigue she surely was feeling. "Hannah."Izzie said, not moving from her place by the door.

"Mommy said you wanted to come visit me. Hi."Hannah replied in a weak, child-like voice.

Izzie closed her eyes, blinking back tears. "Yeah, um...I'm Izzie."

"Izzie's a pretty name."Hannah said as Izzie helped her move the table that held her drawing.

"Do you know-"Izzie approached, trying her best to form the words. She couldn't just come out and admit that she was Hannah's mother. While she knew that Hannah was aware, she wasn't sure of just how much.

"My mom said I was adopted when I was a baby. I know, Izzie. I know that you're the one who gave me up."Hannah stated. While her words may have been sure, as she cuddled against a pink teddy bear, Izzie was sure there was a question lingering there.

Nodding, Izzie's feet remained glued to the floor. Everything inside was screaming, pulling at her, telling her to just do something. But in that moment, she just needed to see. She needed to see Hannah, to know that she was alive. While she wouldn't admit it, a great weight had been lifted by Hannah's admission. "Oh. Listen, I'm...I'm not here to talk about that. Unless you want to. I just wanted to make sure that you're okay."

"I have Leukemia. I don't know what that means, but I hear the doctors. I hear Mommy and Daddy speaking with the doctors. Before I got here, I was really sick. I came here because they said people could help me."

She was in awe in a way about how up front Hannah was. Izzie kind of laughed inwardly, because even hooked up to machines and tubes-Hannah had a spirit that seemed in a way close to her own. "People will help you, Hannah. I can help you if you want me to."

"How?"Hannah asked.

It was a loaded question. How. Izzie wanted in that moment nothing more than to just take Hannah in her arms, to make everything okay again. But she knew that wasn't possible. "Well..."Izzie said as the pink bear fell. She reached down to pick it up, smiling. "Sometimes when I'm sick, I think it's nice to have someone to talk to."She said, placing the bear back into Hannah's arms.

"But you're a doctor. Shouldn't you be helping people?"Hannah asked. She coughed, sighing.

"I do help people. I just-I want you to be better, too."Izzie replied. "And I know that you...probably have some questions for me. So, I'm here. But you need to get better first."

"Okay."Hannah said, satisfied that one day, maybe she'd have the answers she was looking for.

Izzie smiled, feeling the same. "Can I get you anything?"

"It's kind of cold in here. Do you think I could get a blanket?"Hannah asked.

"Um, sure."Izzie said, locating the cart in the corner. She picked up a hospital blanket off of it, walking back to Hannah's bed. She watched as the little girl cuddled up next to her bear, looking so scared, yet at the same time so strong. Somewhere along the way, Izzie decided she'd do the same. Somehow. "Listen, I should probably get going. Your mom and dad would probably like to get back in here and see you before your surgery."

"Is it going to hurt?"Hannah asked, sounding so vulnerable. "You're a doctor, right? So shouldn't you know?...When I wake up, will it hurt?"

Izzie bit her lip, fighting back tears. "A little. But once you wake up, the Leukemia...it won't go away, but it will help you."

Hannah forced a smile, her eyes glimmering with a newfound sense of hope. "Okay...thanks for the blanket."

"Yeah. I'll just-I'll send in your parents now."Izzie said.

"Will you come back?"Hannah asked.

Izzie turned around, giving her a nod. "Yeah, I'll be back."

* * *

"So?"Alex asked as they stood at the coffee cart.

"So what?"Izzie asked.

He looked around, offering a shrug. "How'd it go?"

"It went better than it could have been. She's not ready. I'm not ready."Izzie replied, taking a sip from her cup.

"Makes sense. When's the surgery?"

"Later. In a little while, actually. I want to sit in the gallery, of course...but her parents will be up there."She said, noting the way he lingered close.

"So? They let you in today, didn't they?"Alex asked.

Izzie nodding, feeling tired. "Yeah, they did. Hannah did. This is all just...I can't-"

"Izzie-"Alex replied, noting the look in her eyes. She was coming to terms with things, the reality that she had just spoken with her daughter. While he hadn't had time to fully process it himself, Alex knew that she needed someone to stay strong. "Why don't you just go home? Take off early. Chief will understand."

"I can't leave. I can't just...leave. Alex..."Izzie closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. "I'm gonna go in the locker room, grab a granola bar. You gonna join me?"

"No, I've got labs to check up on. Just...page me."

* * *

Izzie retreated to the locker room, hurriedly opening her locker, in hopes of finding something to distract her. She knew she should be working, knew she should find something to do. If Bailey caught her doing something other than working or observing, Izzie wasn't sure what she would do. Hearing the door open, she jumped, causing the contents of her locker come toppling out. "Jeez...people don't-"

"I'm sorry. I didn't...I didn't know anyone would be in here."George said, feet rooted to the ground.

Izzie, belongings on the floor forgotten, stared straight at him. "Looking for something?"

"Uh, no...just...I should go-"George said, heading for the door.

"George, we don't have to do this. We can talk about what happened."

"Talk about what happened?"He asked in disbelief. "What happened shouldn't have happened. Okay? It was a mistake. I love Callie, Izzie. I love her and it's tearing me apart that I did something like this to hurt her. I get that I can't take it back. But can't we just forget that it happened?"

Fighting to swallow the lump in her throat, Izzie forced a nod. "Yeah. Of course."

"So we're good?"He asked innocently.

"No. No, we're not, George. I don't expect things to be the same between us. But I'd like to think that we can still be friends. But you've made it pretty clear by now that we can't."Izzie replied, charging past him.

As she did, George caught her arm. He wanted to say something, to do something. "Izzie-"

"We can't do this, okay? I can't do this."


	5. Just Keep Breathing

**Author's Note: I have been having issues with this site, along with being so busy this past week or so. I am so sorry for not updating any sooner. So, with that...there was a lack of reviews for the last chapter, so if you guys would please just...leave a review. Tell me what you think beyond 'oh, that was cute. Update soon.'...something. Anyway, it helps to know. And as always, if you have any ideas...be sure to let me know.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Izzie was wide awake in bed that night, unable to sleep. The rain patted against the window, creating a rythm for her to focus on. She couldn't sleep. She knew she should, knew she should just close the curtain and go to sleep.

But she couldn't.

Her mind went back to the conversation she had with George when they were in the locker room. Tears filtered into Izzie's eyes, the comforter itching against her skin. She felt bad, guilty. It was true, that Callie and her weren't friends. But still, her and George were friends, and she knew that things would never be the same.

Throwing her blanket off of her, Izzie made her way downstairs. She couldn't think about it. She couldn't rememeber. Izzie did the only thing she felt she could do when she wouldn't sleep. She baked.

* * *

Meredith awoke that night to the sound of bowls banging downstairs. Feeling Derek's arm protectively around her, she heard him mumbling in the dark.

"I'll go see..."He whispered.

"No, it's fine. It's probably Izzie-"

"But what if someone's here?...What if someone broke in?"Derek asked her, worried.

Meredith smiled, kissing him on the lips. "You're sweet...this whole protective Derek thing. But she's been acting kind of off lately. When Izzie's off, she bakes. I'll bring a bat with me or something..."Meredith said, slowly shifting out of Derek's arms. "I'll be okay..."

Walking into the kitchen, she flicked the light on, causing Izzie to jump. "So you can't sleep, either?"Izzie asked her.

"Well, I awoke to the sound of bowls banging around down here."Meredith said, sitting on a stool.

"So you brought down a bat?"Izzie asked sarcastically, stirring the contents of her bowl.

"Derek...he thought someone might have been down here."Meredith said, slowly lowering the baseball bat to the ground. "Just to make him feel better."

Izzie nodded, searching the cabinets for something. "Where are they? I swear we had some..."

"Some what?"Meredith asked.

Izzie turned around, leaning against the counter. "Chocolate chips. You can't make chocolate chip cookies without chocolate chips."

"Izzie-"Meredith protested. "It's almost two in the morning. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Well, I was before I found out that we didn't have any chocolate chips? You were supposed to do the shopping last time. Where are they?"Izzie asked, shaking her head.

"I...forgot. Look, Iz..it's not big deal..."Meredith said, trudging to the fridge. She opened it, looking around a second, then pulled out a yellow _Tollhouse_ tube. "If you really wanted to bake..."

"Seriously, Mer? Who bought that?"Izzie asked, almost accusingly.

Meredith sat back on the stool, taking a knife from the holder on the kitchen island. She sliced the end off of the tube, peeling away some of the plastic. "I did. Because sometimes I get hungry..."

Izzie opened the drawer, pulling out a spoon. "Can I have some?"

Meredith edged the tube closer to her, allowing Izzie to scoop some out. Izzie handed the spoon to her after eating some, allowing Meredith to do the same. "So..."She said, chewing the cookie dough. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."Izzie replied, shrugging. "I just couldn't sleep."

"Right, because you get up every morning at two because you can't get to sleep."Meredith replied, scooping out more cookie dough. "If something's wrong..."

"I know."Izzie replied. "I can tell you."

Nodding, Meredith handed the spoon back to her. "Where's Alex? I didn't see him come in last night, and when I walked by his room, he wasn't there."

"I don't know. He's not here?"Izzie asked, concerned.

"Probably at the hospital. He could have gotten called in...or maybe he's pulling a double-shift."Meredith suggested, again eating some of the cookie dough from the _Tollhouse_ tube.

Izzie shrugged, sighing. "We're eating cookie dough."

She knew it was a purposeful change of subject, but Meredith decided to leave it alone. "Good, huh?"

Laughing, Izzie reached the chocolate chip piece that stuck to her lip. "For now. I'm going after work to buy chocolate chips."

"Is it really the chocolate chips you're worried about?"Meredith asked, biting her tongue as she did. But still, she knew. She knew something was bothering Izzie, and wasn't about to just let it go. Instead, Meredith thought, she'd test the waters.

"I told you, Mer-"

"You're fine. Right. Izzie...ever since-"Meredith thought, trying to form her words in her head. "For a while now, you've just seemed quiet. Distant."

"Distant?"Izzie asked, studying the expression on Meredith's face. She didn't know. She couldn't. "I guess it's work. You know, we've been working pretty hard lately. At least I have. With intern exams coming up, we'll be studying a lot. Stress is all. I'm...I'm fine, Meredith."

Meredith slid off the stool, feeling the cool tile floor against her bare feet. She walked over to her, as if to have proof. "So you're sure you're fine?"

Izzie studied her for a minute, knowing it was no use. She'd find out eventually. "No. But I'm...I'm trying. We all try, right?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna...go back to bed before Derek realizes I'm still not there. Do you need help cleaning up?"Meredith offered.

"Nope."Izzie said, delving into the cookie dough tube again. "I think I've got it."

Meredith nodded, taking one last scoop. "Night, Iz. Turn the light off on your way out."

* * *

Walking through the hospital the next day, Izzie was on her way to turn in some labs when the door to her left opened. "Alex-"She said, staring at him. "What...you spent the night here?"

Alex stared at his scrubs, sighing. "Yeah. I, uh...I was working late with Burke. I didn't mean to sleep here...is everything okay?"

"Yeah. I'm-"Izzie said, showing him the tube. "-taking this to the lab. You should go home...rest."

"I guess. I can take it."Alex said, walking in step with her. "So I...I checked on Hannah last night-"

Izzie stopped, spinning to face him. "Why?"

He shrugged, hoping she wasn't worried about it. "I just..I wanted to see how the procedure went."

"Because..."Izzie offered, wanting to know more.

"I figured you would wanna know. But then I went in the On-Call room and well..."He said, shrugging. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry."Izzie said, smiling lightly. "I guess I was just..worried when you didn't come home. When George lived there, he was rarely not home in time. I mean, not that I'm..."She squeezed her eyes shut, wincing at her words. "I'm sorry. I...shouldn't be talking about him. About..what happened. You don't want to hear about what happened. It's okay, you didn't live there when it happened."

"When he came home in time?"Alex offered, knowing it was an awkward topic for her.

"Yeah. That's it. Look, I've really gotta get this to the lab...I'll see you at lunch?"Izzie asked, feeling the slightest bit hopeful.

Alex nodded, a smile playing on his lips. "Yeah. Later, Iz."

* * *

Izzie left the lab, knowing she should go check on her patient. She was working with Burke, and was trying her best as she could to avoid George, or any possible nurses' station gossip. Because somehow, Izzie couldn't help but get the feeling that this time, she'd be part of it.

Walking onto the elevator, Izzie sighed, reaching for the button for the sixth floor. As she did, a hand reached towards the door to stop it from closing.

"Wait a sec-"Callie said, running into the elevator car. She turned, seeing who else was in the elevator. "Oh, Izzie."She offered, smiling awkwardly. "Hi."

Izzie nodded, settling against the back wall. "Sixth floor?"Callie asked.

"Yep. You too, huh?"Izzie offered, knowing she should atleast try to make conversation.

"Yeah. I'm um..going to see George. We're working on a patient together."

Izzie bit her lip, trying to keep in silence. That is, until the lights in the elevator flickered, the car jolting. "You have _got_ to be kidding me."She muttered.

"It's no big deal, right?...We'll just..I'll press the call button and we'll get out of here in no time."Callie insisted, ignoring the tension in the air.

Izzie nodded, slowly breathing in an out. She only hoped Callie was right.


	6. Guilty as Charged

**Author's Note: So here we are at the next chapter...I wasn't sure about the ending that I left, but yes...thanks to those of you who did review. They mean so much!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Izzie sighed, drumming her fingers against the back wall of the elevator, ignoring the obvious tension in the air. 

"I'm not getting a signal."Callie said, shoving her phone back into her pocket.

"Me neither."Izzie replied, sighing. "Guess we'll have to wait. What do we..."Izzie trailed off, not up to having a conversation, let alone one with Callie.

"So, the...the intern exam is coming soon."Callie offered. "I could...help you study if you wanted."

Watching her, Izzie knew that Callie was at least attempting conversation. "Alex, Mer and I were actually going to hold a study session tonight, but..."She offered with a shrug. "We could try, I guess."

Callie nodded, glad that Izzie accepted her offer. In truth, she didn't want anything to cause trouble. "So should I just...we should probably...make noise or something. So they know we're in here first."

Izzie darted her eyes back and forth in the elevator, trying to think of the safest place to stand, but still be heard. She slowly walked towards the door, hoping they were close to a floor. "Hello?...Somebody, help! Hello, we're trapped in here..."Izzie exclaimed. She sighed, moving her hair out of her face. "Of all places..."She muttered.

"What was that?"Callie asked.

"Nothing. Just that I wish the elevator would just start working..."Izzie fumed, shaking her head.

* * *

Twenty minutes had passed and a small crowd had gathered outside of the elevator. Alex walked up to see Cristina shaking hands with nurse Tyler. "What are you up to, Yang?"

"They're taking bets as to who makes it out in one piece."Mark replied, looking smug against the wall.

"Why?...Someone's stuck in there?"Alex asked, worried.

Cristina snorted, shaking her head. "Jeez, Karev, you're slow."

"It's Izzie. Izzie and Callie."George said. "Cristina, stop-"He said as she took more money from another doctor nearby.

"Maybe I should put my money in here..."Mark said, reaching in his pocket.

"O'Malley or Stevens?"Cristina asked.

He grinned, laughing. "That's a tough call, Yang."

"Guys, stop. We can't..you can't bet against my wife...or Izzie."

"So you're defending the both of them?"Alex tested. He knew what had happened, and was still trying to wrap his mind around it.

"Well, you know...I love Callie. Just because Izzie's my friend doesn't mean I should have to vote against her..."

* * *

Inside the elevator the tension was becoming obvious. Anytime either of them would speak, the other would snort or simply mumble a 'yes' or 'no'. Izzie resided on one side of the elevator, while Callie stood firmly on the other side.

"Do you have the time?"Izzie asked, the silence getting to her.

Callie searched for her watch, but sighed defeatedly. "No, must have forgotten my watch after surgery. Oh, but I have my cell-"She reached for it, then looked back at Izzie questioningly. "But you have your cell, too."

"It's dead."Izzie exclaimed, silently thinking 'just like everything else in my life.' "I usually charge it when I get home and such, but um..I must have forgotten last night."

"Ahh...Well-"Callie said, telling her the time. "We should be out soon. I think I can hear people working."

"Right."Izzie replied, smiling sarcastically. She didn't want to start any trouble with Callie, in fact she wanted to do anything but. Still, as the minutes ticked by ion the elevator, all she was able to do was think. Think of George. Of what she and George did. And in turn, what she and George had done to Callie. It seemed to scream from all of the walls, seemed to taunt her everytime she looked Callie in the eye. Izzie took a deep breath, sitting as comfortably as she could on the bottom of the elevator.

"Is something wrong, Stevens?"Callie asked, out of concern. It wasn't that she didn't like her, but she didn't like that her husband would seem at more times mor econcerned about her rather than his own wife. It was always "Izzie need this" or "Izzie's doing that..". Callie was tired of competing for the prize she felt she herself had truly won. Still, sitting in an elevator with Izzie, she knew something was wrong.

Letting out as sigh, Izzie fumbled with the buttons on her coat. She traced the big blue "SGH" letters before looking up at Callie. "I'm fine."

"Really? Because...I don't know...you seem-"Callie shook it off, knowing better than to press the subject.

"I seem what?"Izzie asked.

Shrugging, Callie could hear the excitement in her voice. "Nothing, you just seem a little off. Not as happy as usual."

"Oh, that's right...ever since you married George, you know how all of his friends feel. Sorry, I forgot."Izzie bit her tongue the sec ond the words left her mouth.

"Can I just...Could I ask you a question, Stevens? You know, just out of curiousity."Callie said, knowing there was no time like the present.

Izzie shrugged, knowing the damage had been done. "Shoot away...it's not like we can exactly go anywhere else."

Nodding, Callie chose her words carefully. "What is it about George that gets you so...worked up?"She laughed, grinning. It was clear that by the mere mention of his name Izzie grew sensitive. "I mean, it's just something I've noticed. I know that I'm the new kid on the block or whatever, but back when he lived with you and Meredith, you treated him like some possession. Like he was your sister or something. And what, now that he has a wife...it makes you jealous?"

"I'm not jealous of you."Izzie replied, almost immediately. "George wasn't our sister. I mean, sure...we said some thing or whatever. But it's not that big of a deal."

"Then why is it that you seem to get nervous anytime someone mentions him? Did you guys have an argument or something? Because seriously, this isn't high school."Callie replied, arms crossed. She knew that they were steadily crossing a line, but Callie figured that the longer they were stuck, the more information she'd try and get.

Izzie felt her stromach do a flip, feeling sick. She stared up at the ceiling, shrugging. Silently, she wondering if she would be able to crawl out. "We had a...disagreement, okay? No harm, no foul. That's it, it's...over."Izzie choked the last word out.

"What's over?"Callie scoffed. "Because honestly, the way you're acting is like you two were in some relationship or something."

"We weren't."Izzie retorted, the guilt twisting in her gut. "We're still friends. We're just...friends that don't live in the same house. Seriously, how long does it take to get a fricking elevator to move?"

Callie knew she'd hit a nerve, and thought Izzie's behavior suspicious, but decided it best to drop the subject until a later time. If anything, she could just ask George. "I don't know. They're working on it."

* * *

"I don't get it. What is it with this hospital and elevators?"A doctor outside said.

"I think it's just general curiousity. But it's a little curiousity that I don't mind..."Cristina mused, waving the cash before stuffing it back in her pocket.

"You're still taking bets, Yang?"Mark asked, walking back by. He had taken the time to check on a patient, and to do a concult, so he was surprised to see that most of the crowd was still leaning against the nurses's station, waiting for the doors of the elevator to open.

"No, she's closed for the day.."Alex said, taking what money she had just taken from someone else, putting it in his own pocket.

"Uh, so you can give that back anytime now, Evil Spawn."Cristina said, curious about the look on his face. "Why do you care, anyway?...You're on of the like, three people here who hasn't put in a bet.

Alex nodded, staring back at her. "Yeah, well I just don't think you should take a bet against your friend."

"Please, Barbie can take care of herself..."Cristina said, as suddenly, the doors to the elevator opened.

"Well, what do you know, they're both in one piece.."Mark said with a grin. "I'll take my money back, Yang..."

Cristina reluctantly shoved her hand into her pocket, retrieving the money.

Alex watched as Callie strided up to George, after speaking for a moment with their rescuer. "That can't be good."He said, turning to see Izzie, heading down the hallway. She seemed worried, and didn't bother to stop and talk to anyone. Curious, he was about to follow her when he heard Bailey calling at them.

"I understand that there was a little excitement this afternoon, but regardless...there are patients in this hospital. Patients that need tending to. So all of you, scoot-"

"Doctor Bailey, with all due respect-"Mark protested.

"You, too."She assured. "All of you, this isn't gossip hour. I do not care if the mayor of Seattle got stuck on that elevator. It's done, it's over...Where is Stevens?"

Alex waived his hand in the back of the crowd. "She left, but I know where to find her."

"Is that so, Doctor Karev? Then I suggest you go tell Izzie that she had better get back to work. I had to pick up labs myself..."And with that, Bailey left.

Alex spun around, trying to avoid any confrontation from either Cristina or Mark, but as he started, he heard Cristina say some comment like "not again", and walked away, pretending he heard nothing. Choosing this time, to instead take the stairs, he had a sneaking suspicion he'd find Izzie somewhere near pediatrics. Still, as he made his way on the stairs, he heard the sound of sobbing, and half way up, he looked to see Izzie. "Iz..."

She stared down at the floor, covered her mouth with a fist. She shook her head feverishly as Alex sat down next to her. "I'm fine..."She managed to hiccup.

"No, you're not."Alex replied, staring at her. He saw truly for the first time how tired and broken Izzie was, and wanted nothing more than to make all of that pain go away. Taken back by how he suddenly felt, Alex knew he couldn't risk it. Still, he wasn't about to leave Izzie crying alone. Placing an arm around her shoulders, he nodded. "Bailey's lookin' for you...are you okay? Really?"

"She knows."Izzie said, piping up a little. Choking back a sob, she stared blankly at the wall. "I didn't say it. I couldn't bring myself to say the words. But I know. I know she...knows that I was with George. And I hate it...I hate what I did. I hate what it's done to me, to my friends..."

"Is that why you were headed to see Hannah?...Hoping one pain could replace another?"Alex asked, rubbing small circles on her back, hoping to comfort her.

"How did-"Izzie asked, turning to see a small smile forming on his lips. It was then that realized that maybe she did have someone on her side. Alex hadn't yelle dat her, hadn't called her a homewrecker-nothing. He was there for her when she needed her. It was a good feeling.

"Come on-"Alex said, handing her a tissue as he helped her to stand. "Let's go."


	7. Hanging by a Thread

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for reviewing. This story gets a little more emotional, but I think you guys will enjoy it. Leave me a review, please!**

* * *

Izzie took a look back at the door to see Alex standing outside. Taking a deep breath, she nodded at him and turned back to the girl sitting in the bed. "Hi, Hannah."She said, trying to keep her breathing under control.

"Izzie, hi. What are you doing here?"She asked, surprised to see Izzie. She'd been thinking a lot about her, and what happened with her. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I just...I was on my way to go check on some patients, so I was hoping it was okay to come by and see you."Izzie said, tentative.

"Oh."Hannah replied, looking tired.

"How are you feeling?"Izzie asked, hoping for something. Anything. Was she mad? Did she even want to talk to her? Anything from Hannah other than simple answers would have been nice, but Izzie knew she'd been through a lot.

Hannah forced a smile, cuddling against her bear. "A little better."

"Good."Izzie said, nodding. "That's good. Can I get you anything?"

"I'm fine. My...parents went home for a little while."She said, afraid to bring them up.

"It's okay.You can say things to me. I'm a doctor, but...I could be your friend."Izzie said, wanting to at least form some sort of bond with her.

Hannah's eyes seemed to light up, finding the idea good. "I'd like that."

"Me too."Izzie replied. She looked at the girl, the one she gave up all those years ago, and couldn't help but feel a little sad. She had a life now, one seperate from her. But she wanted the best life for Hannah-but couldn't help but wish she'd at least say how she felt. She opened hre mouth to speak, but was interrupted by her pager. "I'm sorry, I-"She read the message, frowning. "I've gotta go. I'll come and see you later, okay? If...that's okay."

"My mom and dad should be back by then, but I'm sure they'll let you."Hannah replied.

Izzie nodded, heading towards the door. "Bye, Hannah."

"What happened?"Alex asked, concerned by the look in her face.

"I don't really know. I got an emergency page-"

"Yeah, me too. I meant with Hannah."Alex said as they made their way down. "If you don't mind my asking..."

"No, it's fine. I don't really know. She's not...saying anything."Izzie replied.

Alex frowned as they reached the stairwell. "Is that good or bad?"

"I don't know. She just sits there, saying things. Simple things. But she knows, Alex. She knows about me...who I am to her. I guess I expected her to react a little more."Izzie replied, trying to shake it off like it was nothing.

"Give her time, I'm sure she'll say something."Alex said, stopping her as they were about to exit the stairwell. "Hey, are you okay?...Seriously?"

"Why? I'm fine, Alex."Izzie replied.

Alex shrugged, not believing her. "It's just..you were trapped in an elevator with Callie Torres, and then I found you in a stairwell crying. Upset. I let you calm down, and took you to see your daughter...the one who you gave up. And now suddenly you're okay?"

Izzie looked away from him, sighing. "Come on Alex. we need to go. Patients. It's probably a car crash or something. Victims."

"Okay, Cristina..."Alex replied. "I'm sorry. That was mean."

"Yeah, it was. But it's nice to see you act normal."Izzie replied, running into Meredith. "Hey, do you know what happened?"

"I'm heading down now, too."Meredith replied. "But someone said something about a multiple car crash, several patients in need of surgery. I heard one of the nurses saying something about a guy who had glass stuck in his leg."

"Wow."Izzie replied, suddenly seeming jittery. "Yeah, that's bad. We should..I mean, we're going into surgery, right?"

"Why wouldn't we?"Meredith asked. "You got paged, didn't you?"

"No, I know. But there's going to be a lot of...injuries. Other than bones or fractures..."

* * *

Bailey spotted the three of them, and pulled them towards her. "There you guys are. I've been waiting. Anyway, Yang just went with Burke. Grey, Stevens..you're with Shepherd in OR 4. But be prepared, the woman has extensive head damage. Karev, you're with Torres in OR 2. And O'Malley-"She said as he rushed up. "Where have you been?"

"Upstairs. I was checking the labs for the patient in 2435."He said, as if he were in a rush.

"Good. You're with me. Let's get going, folks. We've got surgeries to do, lives to save..."

Izzie turned to Meredith, taking a deep breath. "Better go.."

"Iz-"Meredith said as they headed to the scrub room. "You don't have to pretend to be okay, you know."

"Why?"Izzie replied, wondering what she knew. "Oh, well..yeah. I was trapped in an elevator with Callie freaking O'Malley. And it sucked, but I'm fine now."

"Whatever you say."Meredith replied as she scrubbed at her hands. "Just...know that I'm here, okay? If something's bothering you or whatever. I know I make this big deal of saying that Cristina's my person and stuff...but George is out of the house, and you guys don't seem to be talking that much lately, so..."She said, applying her gloves. "I'm here."

"Thanks."Izzie replied, smiling. She nodded, sighing. "It's good to know."She said, thinking maybe it wouldn't be bad if she'd just tell someone.

* * *

Two hours later, Alex was in the scrub room cleaning up when Callie opened the door. He could tell she was stressed, but knew better than to comment about it.

"You did good, Karev. The way you assisted there. It was impressive."She said, pulling off her scrub cap.

"Thanks."He said, surprised at her thanking him.

She was quiet, washing her hands. The thoughts kept running through her mind. The conversation with Izzie. The look on George's face when they walked out. It was bad, she knew. Something was going on that clearly she couldn't stop. "So you're friends with Izzie, right?"

"Why?"

"Friends..hanging out? Going to Joe's? Are you or not?"She asked, irritated.

Alex thought for a moment before nodding. "Yeah. We're friends."

"Okay."Callie said, almost like she was preparing herself. "I know that this is kind of awkward. I know that I'm your boss...or at least...above you on the surgical chain. And that my husband is your friend's friend and everything. But I have to know. I...is anything going on between Izzie and George? I know, he's my husband. I should trust him. I get that. But he's not speaking, and Izzie seems to hate me more with each passing day. So just...can you help me out here?"

Alex bit his tongue, knowing he couldn't out Izzie. While they weren't as close as they once were, they had a bond, and he wasn't about to break it-no matter how desperate Callie seemed. "No. They were friends. Are friends. But that's it."He said, shrugging.

"Really? Because I can't help but get the feeling..."Callie replied, frowning.

"Honestly?...The last thing I want to talk about is Bambi's sex life. But trust me, there's nothing going on between them."Alex replied, pushing the door to the scrub room open, walking out.

* * *

Izzie, Meredith and Derek were still in surgery, closing up a half hour later.

"Just make sure you keep it smooth, Doctor Grey. This woman is lucky, with all the damage that's been done."Derek replied.

"She'll have a lot of recovery time."Izzie replied. "We're transfering her to ICU?"She asked, already knowing the answer.

"That's correct, Doctor Stevens."Derek replied to her. "In fact, I need the two of you to take her up. Doctor Norman informed me of her husband's position in the waiting room. I'll be there in a minute. Start an IV drip as soon as possible, Doctor Grey."He said, pulling off his face mask.

Meredith and Izzie took the patient up to her ICU room, as Meredith started an I.V.. "This woman is very lucky. Her car on the other hand, will be unrepairable. She gets a chance..a new oppurtunity with her husband. Someone should be here when she wakes up."

"Yeah. Not everyone gets that chance."Izzie replied, staring at the woman's face.

"Izzie.."Meredith began. She took a look at the woman, then walked over to Izzie, pulling her to the corner of the room. "Go ahead."

Izzie frowned, then felt a lump form in her throat, knowing what she meant. "Mer...I...I mean I shouldn't...not in a patient's room..."

"So? We ate in really old guy's room for how long?...Okay, maybe not you as much, but..."Meredith said in a hushed voice. "I just...I have to know what's going on here, otherwise I doubt I'd be able to help you."

"Why? Why do you care?...Why is everyone smothering me?...How is it that everyone else knows what's right except for me? I made a mistake, Meredith. A mistake. And everyone's at my back. I get it, okay? That it was a bad thing. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry, because right now I have absolutely no idea what to do about it."Izzie replied, her chest feeling tight. She wanted to tell her, thinking maybe it would make part of it better. "I slept with George. It was a mistake. A stupid, big, _drunken _mistake. And I've regretted it ever since. Oh, and to make matters worse...the daughter that I gave up right after she was born shows up with leukemia. And she won't talk to me. She's mad, but she won't say it. I just..I don't know what to do..."

Meredith's mouth hung open, trying to find the right words to reply. "Izzie.."

"Well then...oh, you started the I.V.. Very good, Doctor Grey. Um...Meredith, could I speak with you?"Derek said, opening the door. His eyes grew concerned, watching the look on her face. "What's going on here?"


	8. Lean On Me

**Thanks for the reviews!...I took a little different turn in this chapter, let me know if you like it.**

* * *

"We were talking about the case. How-How lucky this woman is to be alive."Meredith replied, turning to face him.

Derek sighed, halfway believing what she had said. He didn't want to pressure them into ever saying anything. "Oh, well..that's good. Meredith-"He said, moving his head towards the hallway.

Meredith looked back at Izzie before heading towards the door.

"Meredith, wait-"Izzie pleaded. Her eyes searched Meredith for any sign that she might need to worry.

She placed a hand on Izzie's shoulder, nodding. "It's okay, Iz."Meredith assured her, while she was still in shock at what Izzie had said. "We'll...talk about it later."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I..spilled everything on you. I'm sorry that I dragged you into this."Izzie said, shaking her head.

"Listen to me, okay? You'll be fine."Meredith assured before heading towards the door.

Sighing, Izzie swore to herself that she'd hold it all together. While she was scared to admit it, part of her felt better now that Meredith knew. Still, Izzie knew she had a job to do, and couldn't let her problems get in the way.

* * *

That night, Alex was buttoning his jeans when Izzie walked into the locker room. "Hey."He said, nodding. 

She smiled, shrugging. "Hi. Bad day?"Izzie asked, seeing the look on his face.

"No, I'm fine. But there's...probably something you should know."Alex replied, walking towards Izzie and her locker.

Izzie felt curious, watching him. "What's that?"

"Callie...asked me."Alex said, hands in his pockets. "If there was anything happening between you and George. She was paranoid, almost like she was losing it, shaking her head and eyes all wide..."

"Alex..."Izzie said, her voice wavering as she slipped on a pair of jeans. "You didn't-"

"I didn't tell her. I said that there wasn't. Because there's...there's not, right?"Alex asked, not wanting to push the issue. He had been the one who helped her when she was freaking out, but they never really, truly talked about it.

"No, there's not. Which...it kind of scares me, you know? Because we used to be friends. We were happy helping each other whenever it was needed. But now..."Izzie said, shaking her head at the memories.

Alex shrugged, offering a smile. "You've got me."He assured her.

"And Meredith."Izzie replied. "I...told her the truth. About everything. Well, not exactly everything, because afterall she doesn't know that you know but..."Izzie stopped, closing her eyes. "It's a start."

"A start at what?"Alex asked her as she turned towards her locker. He tried not to watch, tried to not be distracted as she slipped her scrub top off, slipping on a tight, black T-shirt in its place. Shaking the thoughts from his head, he cleared his throat.

"I have to move past it. I'm trying to...somehow. Thank you. For listening to me when I freak out and for just...for being there."Izzie finished, shaking her head as she slide back into her shoes. Reaching inside her locker, she pulled out her jacket and her bag, and closed the door, leaning against it. "I don't know what I'd do..."

"So are you ready to go?"Alex asked as other doctors started to come in.

"No, I'm...I'm going to go see Hannah before I leave."Izzie replied.

"Hannah?...But you-"Alex paused, watching as an intern walked past. "Do you want me to go with you?"He asked, worried of how she might react.

Izzie shook her head, adjusting the strap on her shoulder. "I need to do this, Alex. I can do it on my own."

"Well, if you're sure..."Alex replied, nodding.

"Hey..."She called, nervousness swimming inside of her. While she wasn't sure of how she felt, Izzie knew that Alex was her friend, and he'd obviously had it rough that day, too. "Joe's?"

"Good to me. See you there..."Alex said, leaving the room, just as Meredith entered. He grabbed her arm slightly, as if to pause her for a minute. "Hey...I know that...I know what Izzie told you. And I just...we need to be careful. She's...she's Izzie."

Meredith's eyes connected with his as she nodded, wondering silently how he knew. "She told you?"

"It's complicated. Look, we're going to Joe's. If you want to-"

"I'm going with Derek tonight. It's...personal. So um, you two have fun. Alex?"Meredith said, feeling concern for her friend. "Take care of her."

Nodding, Alex knew he would. "I will."

* * *

Izzie stood outside of Hannah's room, watching as her mother read her a story. It stung, Izzie thought. It hurt to see another woman connecting so deeply with someone she had given birth to. She made the right decision, of that she was certain. But watch Hannah try to find strength to smile for another person brought tears to Izzie's eyes. Wiping them away, she took a deep breath before knocking. She waited a moment before Hannah's father answered. 

"Doctor Stevens. It looks like you're about to leave. Can I help you?"He asked.

"I just...I was. About to leave, I mean. I just wanted to see Hannah before I left. I hope...that's okay."Izzie said, tentativeness causing her to squirm.

"Don't get me wrong, Doctor Stevens...Isobel. My wife and I will forever be greatful for the oppurtunity you have given her. Both in giving her life and in turn donating marrow. But Hannah's still a frail, weak little girl. She knows who you are, and she understands why you're here. I just don't want her to be confused."

Izzie nodded in understanding. "I know, sir. I know Hannah is weak. She's sick, and I'm not...I'm not trying to break my way back into her life. You and your wife took her in because I couldn't give her the life that she needed. I'm sorry that I couldn't everyday, but I am a surgeon now. I make my choices based on science, on..."Izzie shook her head, reminding herself to keep her emotions in tact. "If you're asking me to stop visiting her-"

"Oh no, by no means are we asking you to do that. In fact, after you visit, Han seems to be a little bit brighter."He assured. "I just think it would be appropriate if my wife or I were there at the time."

"Why?"Izzie questioned, feeling a slight hint of betrayal. "You think I would try to do something to harm her?"

He shook his head in defense. "No, Isobel. We are aware of your feelings towards our daughter. I just feel that it would help her become less confused and frustrated with the issue. That and...my wife has been trying to explain her sickness to her. I think it would be better if we could get both sides at the same time."

Knowing she should go, Izzie nodded, leaning closer so she could see Hannah. She offered a wave, smiling. "Thank you. I'll...be sure to check with you whenever we're both available."She said, heading toward the elevator, but paused, feeling the need to take the stairs. She ran all the way down, nearly knocking down an orderly as she made her way down several flights. As she reached the door she needed, she pushed through, heading towards the big glass doors that lead outside.

She pushed her way out, feeling a sudden need for air. Her hand reached up to her cheek, surprised to find that she had been crying. As she made her way towards the parking lot, she heard a voice calling her.

"Izzie?...What happened?"Alex asked from a bench.

"It thought you were supposed to meet me at Joe's?"She asked, spinning towards him. "But you're here. Outside the hospital."

Alex stood, moving towards her. "I figured that maybe it might be better to wait for you here. That way we could walk in together. But you know what...from the looks of things you aren't exactly up for-"

"I'm fine. I am...fine."She said, shrugging as a light mist began to fall. "Hannah's parents..well, her _father_...doesn't want me to see her anymore. Actually, he doesn't want me to se her without them. Without their permission, them being in the room...whatever. Anyway that you slice it, he doesn't want me to see her."

"Izzie..."Alex said, bringing his hand to her cheek to wipe away at her tears. "They're only trying to help you and Hannah."

"If they were trying to help, why didn't he let me in to see her? Why...why did he look at me like I was some criminal? Everywhere I go, it's like people are looking at me, judging me. And I'm sick of it, Alex. I'm sick of it. I just...I just want everything to be normal again..."She sobbed as he pulled her to his chest.

Alex struggled to find words, content in just holding her in his arms. "It'll be okay, Iz. Trust me."

"You don't know that, Alex."She sobbed. "You don't know that I'm not destined to be this adulteress child abandoner forever. It's like this nametag that's plastered to me. It's going to be something I have to learn to live with."

Alex rubbed circles on her back, sighing with her until she calmed down. "Izzie..."He said, nudging her. "Izzie come on, look at me..."

Izzie took a deep breath, trying to find the strength to look up at him. She stared into his eyes, finding something kin to what she was feeling. Pain. Hopelessness. A desire to make things better. She opened her mouth to speak, but instead found herself hearing his voice.

"It's not going to be like this forever. You're not going to feel miserable all the time. I know it's...kind of hard to believe right now. But...there'll be a way."Alex assured her, hoping he had the strength to believe it himself.

Taking a deep breath, it was then that Izzie noticed Alex's arms around her. He had held her once, but it seemed like so many ages ago. All along, he had been the one who yes, at times could be an overbearing ass-but when she needed him, he was there. Alex was the one who cradled her after Denny died, who moved in after George left. He was always there. "There will be a way..."She repeated.

Alex nodded, watching a change in Izzie's deep, brown eyes.

Izzie reached to wipe away a large raindrop that had fallen against his cheek. It had started to rain a little harder a few seconds before. "Why do you...why is it that you care, Alex? Why are you able to help me, even after some of the mean things I've said to you?"

"You've said mean things to me?"Alex asked, concerned.

"Well, about you..."She muttered, rolling her eyes.

"Because I've always cared. I know that I haven't always been the nicest guy, but I'd like to think that I'm the most honest guy. And sometimes that's what you need the most."Aled said, his arms still around her waist.

"So what do you think?"Izzie asked, afraid of what his answer would be. "Of me and all of this?...I mean, I know that everyone makes mistakes and keeps secrets. But this...it's a bit big."

Alex shrugged, content in the fact that Izzie wasn't pulling away. "You made a mistake. You realize that it was a mistake, and you're trying to do better for yourself by it."

Izzie nodded, sighing. "I just didn't expect anyone to be so understanding."She offered with as shrug. It was then that she began to feel Alex slowly releasing his grasp on her. She felt cool air hitting her waist, even though his arms were still there. "But you were, Alex."

He agreed, watching her as she seemed to hesitate. Studying the look in her eyes, he watched as she moved closer to her. Within seconds her lips were against his, pulling at his, eager for contact. Knowing what she was doing, Alex pulled back. "Izzie, we can't...I mean, not...now."

She appeared hurt, but seemed to understand. "Fine. I'm sorry, I..."

"Hey-"He offered, smiling. "It's okay."

Izzie looked across the parking lot, letting out an exhausted sigh.

"Don't take it as me turning you down. Just take it as me not wanting to take advantage of a bad situation."Alex replied, biting his tongue as he did.

"A bad situation?"Izzie asked, growing defensive.

"Not the kiss...you..being hurt and sad."Alex said. "I'm trying to help you."

Izzie nodded. "Right."

"Come on-"He said, squeezing her shoulder. "I don't really feel like going to Joe's. Why don't we go home and order a pizza. We can watch one of those chick flicks you like."

She laughed, wiping away a tear. "Chick flicks, huh? You really are trying to bribe me."

"Come on, what was that one you and Mer were watching the other day?..._The Way We Were_, _Sleepless in Seattle?_"

Izzie laughed, glad that the mood had lightened. "It was _The Notebook_, and somehow I don't see you watching that."She said, surprised that Alex even knew the titles of so called 'chick flicks'.

"Okay, well then what was the one that you just bought...it was only a couple weeks ago."Alex replied, seeming genuinely interested.

"Alex...thank you. I mean, really...you..offering to watch a..chick..flick. But no, I um...I'm tired. We can still get that pizza."Izzie offered, hoping it didn't seem like she was turning him down.

Nodding, he decided he'd take the offer. "Fine."He said, leading her to the parking lot. "I can take that."


	9. Even the Best Fall Down

**Author's Note: Thanks so much to those of you who keep reading and reviewing. I know that things aren't that far yet, but it'll change. Anyway, this chapter takes place two days after. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Izzie stood brushing her teeth in the mirror when the door opened. Jumping she looked over to see Alex standing there. "You can't knock?" 

"You brush your teeth with the door closed?"Alex retorted, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. His hands moved to his pajama pants, adjusting the waist. They were currently the only thing he wore.

Izzie's hand stilled her toothbrush, still keeping it in her mouth. Her eyes locked with his, not moving.

Alex raised an eyebrow after several moments without her saying anything. "Something wrong, Iz?"

"No, but I'm brushing my teeth. Is there something I can help you with?"Izzie asked, turning her attention back to the sink.

Confidantly, Alex propped himself up against the doorframe. "I went downstairs, and there wasn't any food...I thought maybe something was wrong with you."

"You thought something was wrong because I didn't cook a million pancakes?"Izzie asked, spitting out her toothpaste. Rinsing her mouth, she turned to look at him.

"Well, no. But considering the fact that it's been that way since...well, a long time...I was hoping that you were okay."Alex replied, genuinely concerned. He could tell by the way she was acting that something was going on, or that something had happened. Ever since she tried to kiss him, she seemed jittery. Jumpy, even. He had hoped he could at leats try and approach the subject. "So..."

Setting her toothbrush back where it belonged, Izzie turned back towards him. "So what?"She asked, hand on her hip. "Alex?"

"Nothing."Alex said, knowing that it wasn't the right time to bring it up.

"If you're hungry..."Izzie said, walking past him into the hallway. "I can go and whip you something up. But we have to get to work as soon as possible."

"Why are you in such a hurry?"Alex asked.

"It's...It's Hannah. I spoke with her father, and he says that if I have time on my lunch break, I can stop by. It won't be for long, because they'll be taking her for tests shortly afterward."Izzie replied, shrugging. "But it's something."

Alex nodded, smiling. "It's something. I'm gonna...I'll be right out."Alex said, shutting the door. Just as he did, the door to Meredith's room opened, and exhausted looking Meredith

"Hey Mer...you okay?"Izzie asked, spotting the look on her face.

"I'm fine. Is there coffee?"Meredith asked, frowning at the bathroom door. "Alex?"

"Yeah. He'll be right out. Um...I set the coffee up, but I didn't start it. Do you want to go downstairs, grab a cup?"Izzie asked, leading the way. Once they were in the kitchen, she turned on the coffee pot, then opened the cabinet, pulling out two bowls. "Cereal?"

"Fine with me."Meredith replied, sitting at a stool by the kitchen island. She sighed, leaning her face against her palm.

"McDreamy problems?"Izzie asked, pouring Fruit Loops into her bowl. She passed the box to Meredith, then went to the fridge to grab some milk.

"More like McDad problems."Meredith mused, reaching for the cereal box.

"Thatcher, huh?"Izzie asked, handing Meredith a spoon.

Taking it from her, Meredith poured milk into her bowl. "He called me yesterday. Actually, he showed up at the hospital. He...wants to do some dinner thing. It's part of this whole trying to get to know each other deal."

"Is it what you want?"Izzie asked, taking a spoonful of cereal into her mouth.

Meredith shrugged, her spoon hanging in the air. "I guess. I've been fine without him and everything, so why now?"

"Maybe he's finally trying to see. Mer, after everything that's happened, everything in you life...shouldn't you be happy about something good happening?"Izzie asked. She walked to the coffee pot, pouring them each a cup.

"I guess. I just-how do you do it?"Meredith asked. "How do you...reconnect...with someone that you've barely talked to?"

Izzie paused, looking around. "You...you're seriously asking me?"

"Well, I just...you have Hannah, you know. And I know you've been talking to her. Or at least trying to. I guess I thought maybe..."Meredith trailed off, stirring the colored loops with her spoon. "I'm sorry if it seems insensitive."Meredith said, taking a sip.

"No, no..."Izzie insisted. Shrugging, she let out a sigh. "You don't have to know the rules. There really aren't any. If you want it, you...try and go for it. If you don't, well...then you don't. It's hard, Mer...trying to get back in touch. Sometimes it doesn't work. Well..."She trailed off, watching as Derek entered the room. "Fruit loops?"She asked, extending the box towards him.

Derek laughed, smiling as he reached Meredith. "No thanks. Are you out of Museli?"He asked, walking towards the cabinets. Reaching for the box, he saw that they weren't. "You know you didn't have to stop talking on my account."

"It's fine. I was going to get dressed. Get ready for work."Izzie said, sending a quizzical look Meredith way. "You haven't-"

"No. Alex..."Meredith said, forcing a smile as he entered the kitchen. "It's your turn on groceries this week. We're low on milk..."She said, passing it to Derek.

"I'll be sure to remember that. That is, unless Iz chooses to remind me again. A few times. Either way, I'm sure I'll remember."Alex said as Izzie slapped him on the arm. "Izzie...what was that for?"

"You're being mean. And yes, of course I'll remind you."Izzie said, flashing a smile in his direction before turning to wash her bowl. When Derek and Meredith left the room, she turned back towards him. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?"Alex asked, concerned at her sudden change in behavior.

"Slapping you or whatever. I didn't mean to hurt you."Izzie said, crossing her arms.

"It's okay, Izzie. I'm a tough guy. Look, you don't...you don't have to act all strong about everything, okay? If you're upset, it's okay to let people know."Alex said, squeezing her shoulder.

"Thanks, Alex."Izzie replied. "I'm going to head up...get something on, and then we can leave. Well, that is if you need a ride..."

"Sure. The car's had issues lately."Alex replied, watching Izzie as she walked out of the kitchen.

* * *

Izzie had been assigned to Burke that day, so she scrubbed in with him early that morning. Alex was working with Addison, and had assisted in a C-section shortly after he arrived. The day seemed to be moving on regularly, noone missing a beat. George seemed to be a little off, and Izzie noticed when she bumped into him in the hallways after the surgery with Burke the way he seemed to avoid her.

She wanted to believe it was nothing. She wanted to think for a minute that maybe everything would be fine with them one day, but Izzie decided that until that moment, she'd let him be the one to take the first step. She wasn't willing to let herself breakdown or get too distracted. If she needed a friend, Izzie knew she had Meredith and Alex, and she knew that it would be all she needed.

"Hey..."Meredith said, catching up to her in the hallway. "Lunch?"

"Um, thanks. I have something to do first."Izzie said, pausing. She sighed, offering at apolegetic smile. "Hannah."

"Oh. Hannah. Um...okay. Well then, later?"Meredith asked. "And by the way, what was that thing with you and Alex this morning?"

"What thing?"Izzie asked, acting like she hadn't noticed.

"You two were...smiling, you hit him...not to mention the fact that he managed to know all of this before anyone else. Is something going on?"Meredith asked, hoping it didn't seem like she was pressuring her.

Izzie looked up, Cristina approaching them. "Hi."

"Hi. So, you worked with Burke, right?"Cristina asked, seeming as if she were expecting something.

"Yeah, why?"Izzie asked. "Because seriously, the last thing I need is to be brought into your drama. Are you two not talking again?"

"Sort of. Well, it doesn't matter. Look, I just...I want to know if Burke seemed...upset. Aggravated, maybe?"Cristina asked.

"Cristina..."Meredith said.

"Well, she was working with him. Look, I'm not trying to drag you into whatever drama it is that you think I have. I just want to know. He won't tell me, and we're supposed to be doing this whole relationship thing."

"Then shouldn't you at least ask him?"Izzie asked, exhausted. She knew she wouldn't have long for lunch, so she'd have to get up as soon as possible if she wanted to see her. "Look, Cristina...he seemed fine. He was focused on the surgery. Now if you'll excuse me, I have something to take care of. Mer, can you save me a spot?"

* * *

Izzie stood outside Hannah's room, pausing before she knocked. While she knew she wanted to speak with her, it was in that moment that she realized that she didn't really have a clue as to what about. Yes, she wanted to get to know her. She was afterall her child. Well, she used to be-Izzie reminded herself, taking a deep breath before knocking.

"Doctor Stevens. Come in..."

"Hi Hannah...thank you."Izzie said, turning towards Hannah's father. "I know that you didn't have to let me in to see her, but I'm grateful that you did."

"You're welcome, Doctor Stevens. My wife will be back in a minute, and the nurse said they're coming for Hannah in about a half hour for testing. So...whatever it is you have to say-"

"I'll make it quick."Izzie insisted, walking back toward's Hannah's bed. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired."Hannah replied, cuddling her pink bear closer to her. She watched as Izzie sat down in the chair next to her bed before continuing. "How are you?"

Izzie smiled, happy that Hannah seemed genuinely concerned. "I'm okay. I think...I-"Izzie said, reaching into her pocket. She pulled out an envelope out of her pocket. Opening it, she pulled out a folded piece of paper. "-wanted to give you this. I know you probably don't like staying in the hospital that much, so I thought maybe you could put it up on your wall. This room could use a little decorating."

Hannah offered a weak smile, opening it up. It was a picture of a bear amongst flowers, the sun beaming down. "It's pretty."

"It is. Do you want me to-"Izzie asked, watching as Hannah's father approached.

"Hannah..I could go find some tape. Do you want me to hang it?"He asked, knowing Izzie wanted a moment, yet still wanting to stay in the room.

"Why didn't you come in yesterday?"Hannah asked, worried.

"Well...I-"Izzie said, clearing her throat. "I've been busy. And I knew that you were going to have another surgery. It's important to get your rest as well as your happiness up. That's why I brought you a picture...I um...colored it myself."

Hannah managed a soft giggle. "It's cute."

"I hoped you would like it."Izzie said, brushing the fur of Hannah's bear. "You know I had a bear like that when I was little?"

"You did?"Hannah asked.

"Yeah. It was brown, though. I called him Franky."Izzie said, smiling. "What's your bear's name?"

"I don't know. I never gave her a name."Hannah replied. "Does Franky have to be just a boy's name?"

Izzie shrugged, knowing what she was getting at. Blinking back tears that flitered into her eyes, she was aware of Hannah's father carefully perched in the corner, trying to focus on a magazine. "It doesn't have to be. What do you think? Oh...I know...Francine, maybe?"

"Francine."Hannah said, adjusting the bow. She coughed, careful to cover her mouth.

Izzie reached to grab her a cup of water. "Here, drink some of this."

"Thanks, Izzie."Hannah said, just as her mother entered the room.

"Well, I had to look..but I found one."

Izzie turned to see what she was talking about. In her hands looked to be a baked good of some kind.

"Yay! Can I have it?"Hannah asked. "I love muffins."

"Yes, I know you do. And I know that they make you feel better. I'll tell you what...they're coming to perform the tests. But as soon as you get back, I'll give it to you, okay?"

Hannah smiled. "Okay."

Knowing she had to leave, Izzie smiled sadly. "Well, I guess that means I should go. I'll...see you later."

* * *

Through the rest of the day, Izzie monitored her and Burke's patient, as well as offer assistance in the clinic. When the work day was over, Izzie, Meredith, Alex, and Cristina decided to again head to Joe's. They were going again, and Izzie took it as a signal that maybe things were again returning to normal. That is, until she saw George walk in the door.

"I just...I don't get it you know. She just stood there, tilting her head pretending to be all disappointed. She has to realize that there's such a thing as doctor-patient confidentiality."Cristina said, glass in hand. She had been explaining the story of what had happened with the friend of a patient earlier that day.

"People these days..."Alex mused.

"Speak for yourself. So, have you done the shopping yet?"Meredith asked.

"I'll get to it."Alex spoked defensively, worried as he saw the look on Izzie's face.

Izzie stood, clearing her throat. "I'll be right back."She said, making her way towards the door. "Are you going to join us or just stand back and watch?"

"Izzie..."

"No, George. I just...I don't get it. You know? Yes, we...made a mistake. Okay? I'm trying the best that I can to live with it. It doesn't mean that I have to like it, but what I really don't like is the fact that I lost my friend in the process. Now if you're willing to sit down and have a drink with your friends, then maybe this will work out after all."

George's eyes grew darker, apparently determined to say something. "Izzie, that's not it at all..."

"Then what is it, George? Could you try and clue me in here?"Izzie asked, on the verge of sounding desperate.

"It's Callie. She's leaving."


	10. I Bruise Easily

**Author's Note: Thank you so much to the people that have been reviewing this story. I know that it seems like I'm dragging this out, or prolonging the Azzie side of things. Well, I think that it's important to establish, or highlight the bond that they have-the friendship first, so it doesn't screw up later on down the line. But to those who have been waiting for something along those lines, there's some of that in this chapter.**

**Anyway, please review. I know that people are reading, so, help another author out. You know? It is what helps me out with my writing. Thanks!**

* * *

"Leaving?"Izzie asked, a lump forming in her throat. "Leaving...Seattle Grace?" 

"I don't-I don't know..."George muttered, clearly distraught. "I'm sorry, Izzie. I had to tell her. There was no other way."

Izzie stared at him, as if what he had said was spoken in some other language. "No other way...what are you talking about? We made a-"

George held his hands up, worry clouding in his eyes. "I just thought you should know. You deserved to know, incase word gets around the hospital."

"You think she'd go and tell people?"Izzie asked, fear laced through her words.

"No. I don't think...I don't think she'd tell people. But she's friends with Doctor Mont...with Addison. And she's bound to get it out of her. I don't know..."George mused, leaning his head on a nearby table.

"You don't know? What about me? Don't you think I have problems to deal with, too? Didn't you even realize-"

"I _did _realize, Izzie. Callie's my wife. I...I love her, Izzie. I do. And I know that it isn't what you'd want to hear..."George sighed, staring down at his shoes. "I'm sorry."

Straightening her stature, Izzie gave him a sad smile. She knew he was sorry, because she was, too. It didn't make things better. "Me too. So, I guess I'm going to go back and..."

"Izzie-"George called, causing her to stop in her tracks.

"George, I can't. Okay? There's...nothing left to say. I'm sorry. Maybe we can be friends or whatever."Izzie said, finding the words she was saying hard to utter. "But I think you need to be alone. Trust me, it helps. Bye, George."

* * *

Izzie returned home that night, immediately jumping at the chance to take a shower. Once the water was on full blast, she checked to make sure the door was locked, and climbed inside. Safe inside the warm, watery cacoon, she cried. She was tired, afraid, and sick. Sick of always pretending to be the happy one, of being the one everyone came to with issues, hoping she could help. Massaging the shampoo into her hair, Izzie knew somehow that she'd be okay. She had Meredith-the girl she could confide in. And she had Alex, the one who she-Izzie's hands froze in her hair, soap beginning to sting her eyes. At that moment, it struck her. 

With all of the talking-and helping-Alex had been doing lately,she wasn't sure who Alex was to her.

The sun invaded the dreams Izzie was having the following morning, and as she pulled the covers back she found herself groaning in pain. A result of too much alcohol, combined with the stress of everything happening around her, Izzie knew it wasn't going to end easily. Setting her head against her pillow, she tried in vain to sheild her eyes from the sun streaming in from the window. Grumbling, she stood, padding over to the window to shut the curtains even further than they already were.

As she turned to survey the rest of her room, she wasn't surprised to find it completely folded in shadows. For once, she didn't find that fact at all revolting. For once, Izzie Stevens found the fact that all she wanted to do was curl up in a ball and sleep not at all surprising. It felt better, because if the churning in her stomach was any clue, the rest of the day wasn't going to get any better.

"Iz..."She could hear Meredith calling from the hallway. A knock came at the door, and turning over, Izzie could see her entering the room. "Are you okay?"Meredith asked, almost as if she was afraid of the answer. So far, Izzie seemed like she was handling the issues with George and Hannah pretty well, and she was afraid that maybe she had finally cracked.

"No."Izzie replied, her answer muffled through the comforter that covered her entire body. Pulling it down, Izzie shot a look of pity in Meredith's direction. "I'm sick."

"You're sick?"Meredith asked, not sounding too surprised. "Are you going in?"

Struggling to sit up, it wasn't until then did Izzie realize how weak she felt. "I should. I feel like I should."

Meredith tilted her head, wishing it was brighter in the room. She had seen what happened between George and Izzie the night before, and it didn't take much to figure out what it had been about. Turning on the lamp next to Izzie's bed, she sent her a sympathetic look. "No offense, Iz...but you don't look like you should."

"Thanks, Mer. Really makes me feel better."Izzie shot back, stifling a laugh. "Ow...see, I'm...I have to go in, though. The follow up on a patient..."

"That you wouldn't be able to do like this? Izzie, just stay home. Just for today."

"Izzie's staying home?"Alex asked from the doorway. "Am I interrupting?"

"No, you might as well come in, too. But I'm warning you, I could be contagious."Izzie replied, glad for the company. She watched as he sat next to her on the bed, offering a smile.

"Trust me, if you're contagious, I'd rather catch what you have rather than-"Alex trailed off, watching the look in Meredith's eyes. "Well, anyway...you want us to tell Bailey?"

Izzie groaned, shaking her head. "I'll call in. It's what I should do."She said, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Thanks, guys."

"Will you be okay alone?"Meredith asked, knowing what she was going through.

Izzie nodded, feeling the need to sleep. "They'll think I'm hiding. I'm not, guys. I just-I don't feel..."She began coughing, groaning as she did.

Alex patted her back, feeling concerned. "Maybe you do need to go in. See what's wrong with you."He suggested.

"Thanks, Alex. But i'll be fine. Some cough medicine, a couple aspirins...I'll be-"

"If the next word out of your mouth is fine, I don't wanna hear it."Alex said, warning her. "When are you going to get it? Me and Mer...we're here to help you. If you're sick, you stay home. You deal with it. It's okay to...not be okay."

"Alex is right. I'll try and get out at lunch to see how you are. If you want that is."Meredith offered, not knowing if she'd accept her idea. In truth, she knew Izzie would want alone time, but she herself was almost afraid of what would happen if she did.

Izzie nodded, closing her eyes. She felt Alex's hand, warm against her back. She found herself wishing that it wouldn't go away, that he'd stay there. And while she knew that her nod signaled it was okay for Meredith to come home during lunch if she could, Izzie found herself wishing that it was Alex coming home to help her.

* * *

"You all need to be studying as much as you can, but that does not mean you won't be working. Stevens isn't here today, so the rest of you will have to make up for her absence-" 

"Izzie isn't here today?"George asked, oblivious to the real reason.

"That is what I said, wasn't it? Yang-you'll be with Burke. Grey...Sloan. O'Malley's with Shepherd, and Karev will be with me."Bailey replied, looking as they stared at her. "Did I studder? Did you all suddenly get a massive helping of hearing loss?"

"No, Doctor Bailey-"George began, only for her to cut him off.

"Good. Then get moving!"Bailey said, ushering them off in different directions. She then turned towards Alex, arms crossed. "I trust you won't be giving me any trouble today?"

Alex shook his head to reply. "Not from me, no."

She nodded, pleased. "Good. We have a patient in clinic who needs specimens delivered to the lab..."Bailey began, listing the things she needed him to do before handing him several files that needed to be delivered. "Get to work, Karev. Just because Izzie isn't here doesn't mean you can let up on your work."

He pressed the button to the elevator, waiting impatiently. While he knew what he was doing was important, he couldn't help but get the feeling that he wouldn't be seeing an O.R. that day.

* * *

Izzie rested her head against the kitchen island, watching the timer as time clicked by. Eight more minutes and her batch of muffins would be done. It was probably a bad idea, she knew that. Still, as she had regained some of her strength by sleeping for an extra two hours after Alex and Meredith left, she decided she had to do something. Going in late was out of the question, but making muffins seemed like an okay option.

Hannah liked the one her mother had brought from the cafeteria, so Izzie thought that maybe it would be nice if she could have some that were homeade. Feeling the growling coming from her stomach, she stood up and walked to the fridge, searching for something edible. Spotting a container of rice, she decided to pull that out as a means to eat something before the muffins cooled. Afterall, she planned on taking several of them in for Hannah.

As she pressed the buttons on the microwave, she heard the front door open. "Izzie?"She heard Meredith call.

"Kitchen..."She replied, watching as Meredith walked into the room.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"She asked, setting a bag down on the counter.

Izzie sighed, shrugging. "I'm baking. That's a good sign, right?"

"I guess so, yeah. I don't have much time, I've gotta scrub in at three. You picked a good day to be sick, you know. It's been a slow day. I mean, not that you chose to be sick or anything..."Meredith mused, grabbing a bottled water and the half empty pizza box from the fridge.

Izzie sneezed, waving her hand at her. "It's okay, I understand."She said as the time beeped, signaling it was time to take the muffins out. Sighing, she looked at Meredith. "I just sat down. Could you-"

"It's fine."Meredith insisted, dawning an oven mit to reach in and grab the pan out. "You know, if it was me that was sick, you'd tell me to be up in bed sleeping..."She said, setting the muffin pan next to the cooling rack. "But ince you're...you, I know you won't listen."

"Thanks, Mer."Izzie sighed. "I don't know. I just..I feel useless just lying around here. Like I should be doing something or...something."

"What did you and George talk about last night?"Meredith asked, afraid of the answer she'd get.

"He-"Izzie began, drawing in a stifled breath. "-he said Callie's leaving. Whether that means SGH or him, I have no idea. But I know that she knows, which is going to make going back to work..well-"She paused as Meredith placed a hand over hers. "Yeah?"

"I know the whole thing Alex said earlier will end up contradicting with this...sort of...whatever...but you'll be okay. I mean, things are screwed up now, I know. But things'll...they'll get better."Meredith said, for a moment wondering where all the positive came from.

Izzie noticed, and managed to laugh without wincing. "Thanks, Mer."She said, eating a forkful of rice.

"Good. Okay.."She said, sighing. "So you're okay then? Have you-"

"I took some aspirin about an hour ago. I think I'll just chill on the couch or something. Watch a movie. If I vomit, I've got a bucket. Don't worry, I can take care of myself."

With that, Meredith nodded. "I'm going with Derek after work. Alex should be home sometime sooner, though. Are things okay between you two?"

"Yeah."Izzie said, smiling a little. "Yeah, they are."

Knowing she wouldn't get much more of an answer, Meredith nodded, making sure Izzie was comfortable, and then left.

Izzie did as she said she would for the rest of the day. She slept some, but mostly laid on the couch watching movies. It felt good to have a relaxing day, but at the same time she knew that she'd have to return to work the next day. Whether it would be under good or bad conditions she had no idea. As she reached again for the bucket beside her, Izzie drew in a deep breath, closing her eyes. When nothing came up, she settled down again. Her arm strewn carelessly over her head, she thought again of what had been happening.

There was Hannah. She still wasn't sure how to react to her. Was she supposed to be happy around her, never delving deeper than 'hi, how are you feeling?' and bringing her gifts? Was there some code she was supposed to follow now that she was talking to her own daughter again? Izzie knew that the day would come when Hannah would leave the hospital again, that much she knew. Still, she couldn't help but feel sad. She wanted a chance to know her without either of them getting hurt.

Staring at the television screen, Izzie thought of George. He was her friend, at least she hoped he still was. They had gotten through so many things together. Through Denny, through his father, through Meredith almost dying. It made sense that they'd help each other out. But what happened between them was something Izzie doubted their friendship could survive. It was true-that she loved him-but in a way that friends who ared about each other would. A part of her still missed Denny, still missed being able to see him. Tears poured from her eyes when she thought of what he might think of her.

He wouldn't be happy. Sure, he'd say that things would be okay. She'd get better, she'd be fine. And while Izzie would want so badly to believe it, a part of her knew that she might not be. If he had lived, Izzie thought, she could have been married by now. Of course, it all ended the same night it began. She remembered the way all of her friends stood watching her, watching as she layed next to the body of the man who she thought she loved. The way Alex picked her up, cradling her weeping body away from Denny, away from any memories of the past.What he said to her then had been so much more simpler, so much more kinder than what he had said before.

He wasn't anymore. The body laying on the hospital bed wasn't Denny. He wasn't himself lying there lifeless.

Izzie stared blankly at the ceiling feeling a different kind of feeling flow through her. It wasn't sadness, or fear, and it sure wasn't happiness. It was more of a slightly warm, somber-like feeling. One that told her that yes, she was bruised and broken right now. But she'd seen the way patients came in, and how much better they looked when they came out. Somehow, she felt that things would be okay.

"Izzie!"Alex called from out in the hallway, and Izzie could hear the shutting of the front door.

Forcing herself to sit up, she coughed. "In here."She called to him, staring at his hands as he came in. "What's that?"

Alex smiled sheepishly, holding up a brown paper bag. He sat down on the couch next to her, setting the bag on the table. "Soup. I figured you'd be hungry, and I'm not exactly the best chef in the world, so I figured I'd stop and get you some."

Izzie's eyes grew misty again, and she nodded. "Thank you."

"Yeah, I got Cheddar bacon and Tomato basil...both have potatoes, but I wasn't sure which one you'd want."Alex replied, pulling the containers out of the bag.

"Either is fine."She insisted as he passed her a container along with a plastic spoon. "What's that?"She asked, pointing to a piece of folded paper that was in his hand.

"Oh..."Alex said, setting everything down. He turned to her, contemplating for a moment on how she'd react. "I went to see...I went to see Hannah. I told her how you were sick, and you weren't there, so you sent your friend instead. She uh...she drew this for you.."

Izzie smiled again, taking it from him. As she unfolded it, she saw a picture of a person, who she guessed was supposed to be Hannah, along with a little bear. "Get better Doctor Izzie. Love, Hannah and Francine."Izzie read out loud, almost crying as she did. "Wow."

"Izzie?"Alex asked, again settling his hand against her back. He wanted so much to make sure that she'd be okay, that she wouldn't feel bad or upset anymore. However long it took, Alex swore then that he'd be there. Izzie may have been mean to him in the past, just as he was to her. But she needed him more than she herself was willing to admit. "Iz?"

"I just...I don't know how I'm supposed to be...with her..."Izzie sobbed, setting the soup on the table. Alex nodded, wrapping his arms around her. "Should I be, you know...friendly? I mean, her parents don't like me already. I can tell...they think I'm gonna...I'm..."

"It's okay, Izzie."Alex muttered, kissing the top of her head.

"They think i'd try and steal their daughter. She's _my_ daughter, Alex. I mean, she's...she's their daughter. But I'm the one who..."

"I know. It's okay, Izzie. Trust me."Alex replied, not knowing if he got through to her.

Izzie nodded against his shoulder, clinging to his shirt like a lifeline. "I just don't know what to do. I don't know how...how I'm..."

"Breathe..."Alex muttered, wondering if he needed to worry about her.

"I don't know how I'm supposed to feel."Izzie whispered, gaining some control of her emotions.

Alex had to agree with her. When he was telling her what to do, giving her advice, it was different. He was being her friend then. But buying her soup, seeing her daughter-holding her while she cried..it was something different altogether. He wasn't sure what she needed, but Alex couldn't help but hope that it was him.

Her breathing slowly evened out, and shortly after, Alex realized that Izzie had fallen asleep. Leaning back, Alex couldn't help but smile. It had been a long time since Izzie had fallen asleep in his arms, and as he sat watching her sleep, he found himself hoping that it would happen again.


	11. For You I Will

**Author's Note: Thanks to all who review..they mean so much to me. Nothing much to say, I think this chapter pretty much speaks for itself. Title is borrowed from the title of the Teddy Geiger song, "For You I Will"-I think it fits. Anyway, review, please!**

* * *

"So-"Alex said, standing up. "Study Break?" 

"Oh yes...I thought you'd never ask."Izzie complained, stretching her legs.

He smirked, shrugging. "Well, what we're studying is important, you know. Popcorn?"

Izzie nodded, following to the kitchen. She watched as he reached into the cabinet, pulling out the box of popcorn, pulling out a bag. "You okay?"She asked.

"Yeah."Alex replied, pressing the right buttons on the microwave. He turned his head towards her, curious. "Why?"

Meredith walked in the room, so Izzie shrugged. "Just curious."

"You're making popcorn?"Meredith asked, pointing to the microwave.

"It's what it looks like, yes."Alex said, as if it were obvious.

"Okay. Just asking."Meredith replied, holding up her hands in defeat.

Izzie smiled at him before returning her attention to getting a drink. She turned towards Meredith, raising an eyebrow. "You know you could join us..studying and all."

Meredith nodded, quietly pushing her hair out of her face. "Derek's helping me study. Well, he's supposed to quiz me...so I guess I really shouldn't complain."

"Why do I get the feeling that the studying won't be about the exam?"Alex asked with a smirk as the microwave beeped.

"Hmm...I don't know."Izzie replied, smirking. She set her glass on the counter, looking at Meredith then Alex. "So, you're going?"

Seemingly snapping out of a daze, Meredith adjusted the strap of her bag, nodding. "Yeah, so...if you guys are still up later, I guess I'll see you then."

As soon a Meredith left, Alex turned around with the popcorn bowl in hand, sticking several pieces in his mouth. "Do we need anything else from in here?"He asked.

"It depends. Can we have cookies on a study break?"Izzie asked, shrugging. "I don't think there's a rule against it."

"We have cookies?"Alex asked, frowning.

"Yes, and they're homeade so I'd like to think you like them."Izzie replied, taking some out of the jar. She handed two to Alex, raising an eyebrow. "That is if you still like choclate chip."

Alex nodded in return, placing his cookies on top of the popcorn. "Still do."

Alex and Izzie settled back onto the couch, having moved study cards and reference books onto the table. Izzie reached to the table, picking up her water bottle. When she looked back at Alex, she noticed he was still looking at her. "Is something wrong?"Izzie asked.

He blinked, shaking his head. "No, I'm fine."

"You sure?"Izzie asked in return as she grabbed some of the popcorn.

"Are you?...fine, I mean."Alex replied, taking a bite from one of the cookies.

Izzie smiled, shrugging in return as she was chewing. She offered a half-nod, hoping it was enough to convince him. "I'm trying, you know? Every day is...well, every day is different. Good days, bad days."She said, coughing. "But thank you."

Reaching for his water, Alex shook his head. "No, I just did what anyone would do, Iz. You needed me...you still do, I guess. It's what friends do."He offered, biting his tongue as he did. _Friends._

Trying to hide disappointment, Izzie closed her eyes as she nodded. "Yeah, well you're a good person, Alex. Beneath all of them sarcasm and the smirks and everything else that you let the world see."

Alex laughed softly as he ate some more of the popcorn. "Don't get me wrong though, I'm glad it was me."

"What?"Izzie asked, curious.

"I'm glad that you felt you could come to me. We've been through a lot of things and-"Alex cut off, realizing he was probably digging himself a hole. As he saw Izzie grin, Alex shook his head. "See? This is what happens."

Izzie laughed, slapping Alex's shoulder. "What are you talking about?"

"You asked me if I was fine, then we started talking about you. I helped you, and now you're laughing at me. You laugh at me when I say things."Alex said, his face trying to grow serious. His arm stretched out across the top of the couch as he turned his head towards her. "So maybe I shouldn't say things."

"No, no."Izzie insisted, shrugging. There was a silence that neither knew how to fill as her water bottle hung in the air. The moisture caused it to slip from her hands, spilling out on the floor. "Oh, Sorry-"Izzie said apolegtically, kneeling down to try and clean it up.

"Why are you apoligizing?"Alex asked, kneeling down to try and help her. He picked the bottle up, setting down on the table.

Izzie reached up on the table, grabbing tissues to dab at the water. "Because there are cards down here. Study cards, cards that you...study with. They're not laminated or anything, you know. So we have to hurry up and pick them up before anything happens."She said, hurriedly picking up the brightly colored index cards, wiping them off as she placed them on the table.

Alex laughed, pausing his work to look up at her. "I don't care about the cards. Those were the ones we've already looked at, anyway."He said, placing the cap from the bottle on the table as well. When he looked back, Izzie was still dabbing at the carpet. Reaching for her wrist, he stopped her. "Stop."

"I have to clean it up, Alex."Izzie inisted, looking at Alex's hand on her wrist. She stared back at the carpet, wiping away what was left of the puddle.

"Izzie."Alex called her name, his mouth suddenly dry. When she looked at him, eyes expectant it was too much for him to bare. As he pressed his lips to hers, searching for some kind of reply, Alex was taken back when Izzie's hand rested against his cheek, parting his lips hungrily. He laughed a little as she groaned, her knee coming into contact with the wet spot on the ground.

Gasping, Izzie pulled back. She knew what she'd done, and while in so many ways it made perfect sense, Izzie still couldn't look at him. "Sorry. The...the mess..."Izzie said, standing.

"Wait-"Alex interrupted, standing with her. He brushed away her bangs, finding the look in her eyes amusing.

"Yeah?"Izzie asked, out of breath.

"It's okay. You don't have to run. You don't have to make up some sort of excuse or something. It's okay."Alex repeated with a soft smile.

Izzie nodded, smiling. She wasn't sure why she was so comfortable after what had happened, but it was clear that she was. "It's okay. I mean, you, even with-"

"Izzie..."Alex began, shaking his head. "Do you have to rant this time?"

"What do you mean?"She asked, brown eyes shining with curiousity.

Alex stared down at the carpet before looking back at her. "This thing you do when you get flustered...you start rambling until what you're saying doesn't make sense. You know, like it ever does anyway."

Taking in a deep breath, Izzie took in how they were at the moment. "Alex-"She began, shaking her head.

When Alex saw her reaction, for a moment his heart sank. He'd tried kissing her before, but back then it was far too soon for her to move on with it. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed you."

"No, Alex. That's not it at all."Izzie fumed. "I just..I don't know. With everything that's happening lately, what with Hannah..and of course George..."She smiled, staring at him. "You've been one of the few constant things in my life. I don't know how to thank you."

Alex brushed a crumb off of her cheek before nodding in reply. "You don't have to, Iz. It's what we do."

"What are you saying?"Izzie asked, not wanting to take anything for granted.

"You and me, I mean. Sure, we've had our fighting and bickering and what not. I've said some pretty mean things in the past, and well...you, too. But whenever we need each other, we're there."Alex said, averting his gaze to the other side of the room. "See, this is what happens when I say stuff..."

"But it's true."Izzie replied, her voice cracking. "Alex, I can't really explain what just happened...but I'm not complaining."

Alex laughed, smirking. "I guess that's good."

There was a silence in which both were content in merely standing close to each other, garnering comfort by knowing that the other was there before Izzie spoke. "Slow."

It was this time that Alex was confused. He met her brown eyes with his, frowning. "Iz?"

Izzie drew in a deep breath, slowly trying to formulate the words. "I want this. It's been hanging over us like some big black cloud, and then what just happened...you know, with the water...and I just-"She stopped, sighing. "-Thank you, Alex. For being here for me, helping me wheneve I needed you. It's a side of you that I'm glad I can see. You're a good person, underneath that whole frat boy exterior...which by the way, is officially tarnished in my point of view."She smiled, shrugging. "But with you, I'm happy. I...don't really...know why."

Alex took a minute to let what Izzie had said register. He brought his hand to her shoulder before nodding in agreement with her. "Slow. But-"

"There had to be a but, didn't there? Alex, I-"

Before Izzie could speak again, Alex took her face in his hands, slowly kissing her again. His hands combed through her long, blonde hair, relishing in the moment. Pulling back, his eyes concentrated on her lips before looking back into her eyes. "A kiss to seal the deal."

"Okay."Izzie replied, slowly nodding. Clearing her throat, Izzie patted her hand against his chest. "So, study break over?"


	12. I Just Want You to Know

**Author's Note: I want to thank those who read and reviewed last time, and to just basically let you know that, well-I really do love writing this story. I know it might not seem that way, because up until now updates have been kind of sparse. To be honest, I had a block with this story for about a week prior to the last update-and I felt so bad. Well, everything is worked out now. We're jumping ahead a little...past the exams here. Enjoy-and leave a review.**

**Title from "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls. Oh, how I love this song.**

* * *

Izzie opened her locker, instantly plunging through her belongings, in search of a snack she had brought. There was the usual-her clothes, shoes, a couple of gum wrappers, but at last she found the apple shr packed that morning tucked safely inside her bag.

"So how do you think you did?"Alex asked, walking up behind her.

She shrugged, offering a smile. "Good, I hope. There were a couple that I was borderline about, but I knew just about everything the exam covered."

Alex nodded, now leaning against the row of lockers. "I guess the study sessions helped then."

"Yeah, they did."Izzie replied, a faint smile crossing her lips before she bit into her apple. She looked up, not that surprised to see Alex watching her. "What?"Came her muffled reply.

"I don't know. I was just thinking...do you want to go to Joe's or something tonight? You know, to celebrate or whatever."He asked, shifting his feet as his gaze returned to the floor. "It's just an idea."

Chewing her bite, Izzie took time to think about it, though she already knew her answer. "I'd love to. Well, I would like to-"

"But the answer is no?"Alex asked, a feeling of defeat taking over him.

"No, no. That's not what I meant. It's just...we've spent all day cramming for this exam. But that doesn't mean that we shouldn't go. Celebrate."Izzie replied, excited. In truth, there was nothing more that she would love lately than spending time with him, or just being around the people that she loved the most. It was there with them-with Alex, really-that Izzie felt the most at home.

"Izzie."Alex called, noting her change in attitude. "We don't have to."He smiled, stepping towards her. Placing a hand on her shoulder, Alex nodded. "Whatever you want to do."

"Why does it always have to be what I want to do? Why can't we ever do...you know, something you want? Alex-"Izzie mused, shaking her head. She placed her apple back in her open locker, intending to throw it away later before looking back at him. "I'm okay now. Seriously. Yes, it still hurts..yes, I wish that things would be different, but...that's just the way it is. You've been doing _so_ much for me. Including taking this...thing..."Izzie said, her eyes widening at her own reference of them together. "-slowly. I didn't mean that I didn't want to go anywhere. I just meant after everything it would be nice just to sit and relax. Save the partying until after we know that we're residents."

Alex remained quiet a moment as he held Izzie's hand, brushing her knuckles with his thumb. "See, that's good."

"What? Why?"Izzie asked, sounding concerned.

He shrugged, acting as if it were nothing. "I was just thinking that we could go down to that pizza place down the street. They've got spaghetti, too..It's probably not as good as yours but I think it could pass for edible."

Izzie smiled at him, breathing a sigh of relief. There were times when she felt like hitting him, or yelling at him. But lately all she felt she could do was simply smile, content it being around him. "Why is it that lately you seem to think of everything?"

"I don't know, Iz. I guess I'm just special that way."Alex bit back, laughing when she pretended to hit him.

When Izzie was about to reply, the rest of the group walked in-Cristina came in first, immediately flopping down onto a bench. Meredith followed, opening her locker to check her cellphone. George stood idly between the door and the trash can, trying to act content in throwing something away.

After the room remained silent for several minutes, Cristina shot up. "What, did we interrupt something?"She asked, noting how close Alex and Izzie stood.

"Everyone's tired. We just took a huge test."George replied, throwing away the rest of the wrapper from his candy bar.

"No, everything's fine."Izzie insisted, nodding. "So, how did everyone do?"

"Are you kidding? Yes, the test probably kicked our asses, but you know what? I tried."Cristina said, lifting her hair from her neck before laying back down. "I tried hard."

"Mer?"Alex asked, noting the fact that she hadn't spoken. "What about you?"

Meredith turned around, slipping her phone into her pocket. "Good. I think. Good."She said, nodding. "George?"

George finished chewing the last bite from his candybar, nodding before he replied. "It was horrible."

"What?"Izzie asked.

"The test, I mean. It was long, and asked too many questions, and...I hope. It's all we can do, right?"He asked.

Alex shrugged. "Yeah, I know what you mean. So..."

"Does anyone wanna go to Joe's tonight?"Cristina asked, again breaking the silence. "Because I am seriously feeling the need to consume alcohol at the moment."

"Sure."Meredith replied, tying her hair back. "Sounds good to me."

"I, uh...I'm kinda tired, guys."Izzie said, shooting a glance at Alex making sure he understood. "But go...have fun."

Alex nodded, stuffing his hand into his pocket. "Yeah, actually...I've got plans."

"What, does Evil Spawn finally have a hot date?"Cristina asked.

Coughing, Alex knew she was staring at him. "And just how is that any of your business?"

"She was just asking a question."George replied, not really sure of why he was defending her.

Within a few minutes, the other interns had crowded in, and the group slowly began to fall apart, eventually leaving only Alex, Izzie, and George. George looked up from his backpack, staring at the other two. "Were you guys leaving?"He asked, attempting to make small talk.

"Yeah, in just a minute. Why?"Izzie asked, looking away from Alex. When he nudged her, Izzie nodded, signaling that it was okay for him to go.

"So what was that about?"George asked after Alex left the room.

"What do you mean?"Izzie countered, slipping into a regular pair of shoes.

He sighed, shutting his locker. "I don't want to fight with you. In fact, I really don't like to. So can we please, just...not fight?"

Izzie smiled sadly, laughing a little. "George, you're-you were a part of my family. Before all of this got screwed up. Before what happened between us, and all of the lies...and the secrecy. Everything that we were, that we might still be, was covered up by all of the bad that happened because of one big mistake. I know that we can't turn it back, that for some things it's probably too late."She said, shrugging as she clutched her jacket in her hands. "But that doesn't mean we can't start over."

"Start over?"George asked, wondering what Izzie meant.

"Start over. Not like some rewind button thing. Just...forgiving. I know that we can't forget what happened, and just so you know, I'm not asking you to. Still, I'd like to think that maybe sometime we could all hang out as a group again. We've been through one of the hardest years of our lives together, and to end it lie it is now just doesn't seem fair."

George scanned the room before double-checking again that his bag had been zipped. Looking back up at Izzie, he knew that it was something she truly wanted. While he wasn't sure why, Izzie seemed better now-brighter, happier. There was still a hint of sadness there, but it seemed like maybe she was herself again.

"George?"Izzie asked, sensing that he had something to say.

"Callie-"He began, shaking his head. "Callie and I...we're staying together. I don't know why, I can't really...tell you. But we're giving it another try. I just thought you should know."

"Okay."Izzie replied, nodding. "As long as that's what makes you happy."

"Good. Well, it does."George said, clearing his throat as he did. "Well, I should probably get going. Hey, are you feeling okay? I mean, I know you said-"

"I'm fine."Izzie replied as she waved her hand at him. "Just go, go...I'm good here."

* * *

Alex opened the door to the restuarant, allowing Izzie to walk out first.

"Wow...you order, and you're a gentleman? Honestly, I never would have expected it."Izzie said, grinning as they made their way out into the parking lot.

"Yeah, well I only do it on the first date. Get you hooked, and by then you just can't stay away."Alex replied, sheepishly looking away.

"Trust me."Izzie replied. "If I could have backed away, I'm pretty sure I would have done so a long time ago."

Alex realized what Izzie was saying, but chose for the moment just to stay silent, standing there with her.

"So you wanna go home?"Izzie asked, swaying back and forth.

"Sure. I'm sure they're probably still out, so it'll be nice and quiet for you."Alex said, recalling what Izzie had said from before.

"Or...we could just go ahead and catch up with them. I mean, not literally catch up, because knowing Cristina and well, who am I kidding...Meredith-"

Alex laughed, shaking his head.

"Okay, see, now isn't the time to be laughing, Alex. Now is the time to-"Izzie stopped mid-sentence, realizing she had no clue what to say. Instead, she stared up at the sky, realizing that for the first time in a long time she was actually able to see the stars. "It's clear tonight."

"Hey, it is."Alex said, amused at how in awe Izzie seemed in that moment. "I know this place that has a great view of the stars, actually. It's pretty clear, comfortable, too."

"Really? Oh wait, I know where you mean...that place with those wooden benches."

"Actually, I was talking about our backyard. But you know, wherever you wanna go."Alex replied, shrugging. As he watched her, he knew then that everything was slowly returning to normal again. It didn't matter that they had taken the test that would make or break their medical careers that day-well, it did. But in that moment, to Alex, all that mattered was that one Izzie Stevens had the chance to be herself again.


	13. Wherever You Go

**Author's Note: So I'm sorry this chapter comes a few dayslate, but I'm not feeling too well, and I've been busy with school and such. Anyway, I hope that you enjoy--and review, please! I've changed a few things, like George didn't fail the exam...but nothing huge...**

**Incase you're wondering, the title is from A Fine Frenzy, "Wherever You Go."**

* * *

Cristina clutched her results in her hand, waving them proudly in the air. 

"I'm guessing you passed?"Alex asked, leaning against a row of lockers.

"Shut up, Evil Spawn. Of course I did."She bit back, folding it up carefully. "Cardio, here I come."

"You get that we still have time to decide, right? I mean not that you haven't already decided but..."Izzie trailed off, staring at her own paper. She passed, and with it, she felt as if a weight had been lifted.

Everyone discussed their results, all speaking about which specialties they planned on going into. Cristina was obviously going into Cardiology, while Meredith was most likely going into Neurology. Izzie was leaving the lockerroom when Alex called her.

"Something wrong?"She asked, twisting towards him.

He shrugged, laughing a little. "Just wondering where you were going. Nothing huge."

"Oh. Okay."She replied, not entirely believing him. "Hannah. She's leaving in a few days, and I just...I wanted to go see her."

Alex nodded, realizing now that she was able to go alone. She was okay now, and didn't seem as upset when anyone mentioned her daughter. "Sure. So, lunch?"

"Lunch."

* * *

Izzie entered Hannah's room quietly, and stood there, content in watching her color. While Hannah still looked weak, Izzie knew somehow that day by day she was getting stronger. "Hi, Hannah."She called, walking over to her bedside. "What do you got there?" 

"Izzie!"Hannah exclaimed, in that moment her eyes lit up. "Oh...just somethin' I guess. Dad bought me some books to color in so I'd have something to do."

Nodding, Izzie pulled up a chair. "You know when I was little, I used to color, too."

"What was your favorite color?"Hannah asked, genuinely interested.

Delving into Hannah's crayon box, Izzie pulled out a dark blue one. While it hadn't been her favorite color, she had always loved to draw with it. "This one right here. Because it can be the color of so many things-the sky...water...you know, anything."

Hannah took the crayon from Izzie, carefully completing her picture with it. Izzie helped her in setting her supplies aside, and getting her a cup of water, before she could relax.

"So how are you feeling today?"Izzie asked, knowing she didn't have long before she had to leave. While she knew in a way she'd always be connected with Hannah, Izzie felt like these last few times she got to visit with her were the ones in which she got to say both hello and goodbye.

"Okay, I guess."Hannah said, taking a sip from her water. "Can I ask you a question?"

Izzie bit her lip, not entirely expecting Hannah to answer like she did. "Sure."She replied.

"Well, it's just-"Hannah paused, scanning the room. She sighed, trying to muster the right words to say. While she was only a child, Izzie could tell that what Hannah had to say was important. "-I don't know...I mean, I know you're my mom. Well, you're..."She sighed, tears pricking at her eyes.

"It's okay."Izzie whispered, patting Hannah's arm. "Go on."

Hannah absent mindedly chewed her lip, all the while staring ahead. "My parents are awesome. They take me places, and let me do things...and they don't look down on me like all of the kids did at my school when they found out. And they're really cool, but Izzie..."Hannah stopped again, this time turning to look at her. "You're cool, too. I've been really tired...or hurt or something and you've done what you could to take care of me. I know I'm not all better, but when I leave in a couple days..I just.."Hannah choked, not knowing what it was that she could say.

Izzie stood, at a loss of knowing what to do, and simply wrapped Hannah in a tight hug. "You'll be okay, Hannah."She said, taking a deep breath. "Your parents will take you home...and you'll heal some more. Before you know it, you'll be all the way better."

A muffled response came from Hannah's direction as she nodded against Izzie's shoulder. "Thanks, Izzie."

"Hey, I know..."She replied, pulling back with a smile on her face. "When you leave, well...before you leave...do you think we could have our own little party?"

"What do you mean?"Hannah asked, curious.

"Well, because you got better. You're still going to need to see doctors, and do tests...but you're getting there. You aren't as sick as when you came in. So, I think...we'll have to ask your parents of course..but before you leave, we could have a party. You know, to celebrate you getting better."

Smiling, Hannah seemed to like the idea. "Can you come?"

"Can I come? Of course I can come...ooh, and maybe I can bring you some chocolate chip cookies. Do you think you'll like that?"Izzie asked, thrilled and sad with the idea at the same time.

"Cool."Hannah replied, just as her parents stepped back in. "Hi."She said simply, not knowing if Izzie's plan should still be a secret.

"Hi, Han. So we just got back. The doctor says he'll need to keep you for a few more days, just to make sure. Do you think you can wait that long?"He asked.

"Okay."Hannah replied, snuggling close to her bear. She looked up at Izzie, who at the moment was checking her watch. "Izzie..do you have to go?"She asked.

Izzie sighed, thrilled that Hannah wanted to spend time with her. "I tell you what, Hannah. I can come back tomorrow...and if you're lucky, I might try and bring you some of those cookies we talked about."

Hannah nodded, trying her best to give her a hug. "Bye, Izzie."

"Bye, Hannah."Izzie replied, turning to see her father, clearly wanting to speak with her. "Hi. Is there something wrong?"

"No, the...the opposite actually. Hannah...she's been through so much. I know that you're a doctor here, and tending to a child who isn't your patient can never be easy. Especially when she's the child that you know you've given up."He said, knowing the moment was awkward. "I just want to thank you. While I admit I might have been a little afraid at first, I see how you coming to visit Hannah helps."

"Wow, thank you so much."Izzie replied, not knowing what else to say.

* * *

As promised, Izzie met everyone at Joe's to celebrate their passing of the test. It felt somehow, especially with George sitting with them, that everything was returning to normal. But as she felt Alex's arm slide around her waist, she was reminded that this time she wasn't alone in all of the celebrating. "Another round, Joe!" 

"Whoa...hold on Barbie.."Cristina called, attempting to point a finger in Izzie's direction. "Am I missing something? Or is the tequila seriously kicking me that hard? Because seriously...from where I'm standing..sitting, whatever. You and Evil Spawn are...well, closer than-"She said, searching for a comparison. "Well, Me and George."

"See, that's because Meredith is sitting between you two."Izzie noted, momentarily stepping free from Alex's grasp, using grabbing her purse as an excuse.

"Oh, see that's true."Cristina muttered, laying her head against the bar.

"So you don't want to tell them?"Alex asked, eyes showing he was hurt.

"Tell them?"Izzie asked, a nervous feeling forming in her stomach.

"Tell us what?"Meredith asked, setting her glass down in the counter.

Izzie sighed, shaking her head. "I have to go make a phone call. There's...there's no reception in here."She muttered, continuing to shake her head as she walked towards the door.

They all sat silent, watching the path in which Izzie had left, until Cristina piped up. "Okay, so can someone tell me what just happened here?"

Meredith leaned to look at Alex, who looked just as surprised as everyone else did. "Alex?"

"I know."He said, taking a breath as he moved after her. When he found her standing out in the parking lot, truth be told, he wasn't sure if he should go up to her. The way she stood told Alex that something was wrong, or at least appeared to be. "So do you wanna tell me what just happened in there?"Alex asked, slowly edging towards her.

Izzie turned around, a defeated look visible on her face. "I don't know."She muttered, shrugging.

"You don't know? Cristina saw something and was, as usual, poking her nose in everyone else's business. But-"Alex said, offering a shrug. "That doesn't mean that we shouldn't tell them."

"I know that, I do. It's not that I don't want to, it's just..."Izzie pushed her hair out of her face, sighing. "Today was...huge. From finding out that we're residents, Hannah...basically speaking openly with me. And this, Alex...us. We're...us. It's big, huge and one of the most important things to me. I need you to know that, because you are so-"Izzie shook her head, trying to find the right word to describe him. Coming up fruitless, she tilted her head, bringing her hand up to cup his cheek. "You followed me out here."

"I followed you out here."Alex echoed.

"Why?"Izzie asked.

Alex nodded, knowing there was more of an answer than she was probably looking for. Still, she needed to hear it. "Because, Izzie...I love you."


	14. One Foot In Front of the Other

**Author's Note: Thanks again to those who reviewed the last chapter. This story is sadly coming to a close-but not too soon. I've got a few interesting things within these last few chapters, that I hope you all will like. **

**Congratulations to Katie Heigl on her Emmy win, by the way. She was fabulous!**

**So yeah..read...love..review?**

* * *

Izzie awoke the next morning feeling a weight sprawled heavily against her stomach. She kept her eyes closed, focusing on the fact that within seconds she'd have to open them in an effort to wake up. As she did, her thoughts drifted back to her. 

He loved her. Alex said he loved her.

She moved, craning her neck to look behind her. Alex. It made sense to her really, and while she expected to feel scared or in a panic, as Izzie watched him sleep she wasn't at all. Because in truth, Izzie loved him, too.

It was then that the panic rose within her. She loved him. She loved him, but she didn't say it back. Alex pulled her close, perhaps by instinct, and as Izzie felt his breath against her neck, she knew she was safe where she was. Still, she didn't say it back. Thoughts crowded her mind, telling her it was a mistake-that she should have said it, afterall it was true. 'We wouldn't be where we are now if he wasn't okay.' Izzie thought to herself. 'Alex said he loved me, and I kissed him. We came home, and now we're lying in bed. That's it, this is where we are. This is that huge. What if he-' Izzie's thoughts were interrupted when she felt his lips against her cheek.

"Morning."Alex whispered, pulling her close.

"Hi."Izzie replied, a nervous wave washing over her. "So I guess we-"She continued, clearing her throat. "I guess we should get to work sometime today."

"Way to kill a mood, Iz."Alex laughed, grinning.

"Well, I wasn't trying to-"

Alex put a finger against her lips, in an effort to silence her rambling. "It's okay."

"But.."Izzie protested, only to get a stern look in return.

Alex stared at her, trying to gauge her reaction. When he didn't see any fear after what he had said, Alex decided the moment had passed, and made an effort to move. Izzie pulled him back against her, settling her head against his shoulder. "Five seconds ago, you were pushing me away. Now you can't get enough of me?"

Izzie sighed, shrugging against the rumpled sheets. "A little bit of both, actually."She mused, her hand settling against his bare shoulder. She closed her eyes, trying to focus on saying the words. It would be so easy, to just come out and say it. But she was Izzie, and Izzie wanted perfect. Opening her mouth, she was about to speak when stomping was heard in the hallway. "So much for the perfect moment..."She muttered, shaking her head as she and Alex got up.

"She's the one who called me!"Meredith's voice could be heard from the hallway.

"We were in the middle of something..."Derek called. "Mer, come here. I'm sorry..."

Alex sighed, shaking his head. "The dude's whipped."

Izzie hit him, smiling sheepishly. "Sorry?"

Leaning in, Alex kissed her. He let his lips linger slowly against hers, his tongue darting out to brush her lips. When the slamming of a door in the hallway was heard Alex couldn't help but laugh. "I guess that means we should go, huh?"

"I guess so."Izzie replied trying to hide her anxiety with a laugh. Her feet touched the floor and reality hit her. Somehow, she'd let him know today.

* * *

"Don't worry, Mr.Lasting. We'll get your lab results soon, and then we can determine if you'll need surgery."Izzie said, stepping quietly out of her patient's room. As she began to walk down the hallway, she heard someone call her name.

"Stevens, I need to speak with you."Callie said, falling into stride with her.

Izzie cringed, trying desperately to hide her distaste. "Sure, what can I do for you?"

Callie sense the tension but pretended not to. She grabbed Izzie's arm, pulling her into a nearby breakroom. "Okay, I've been going over this in my head for the last hour, and I really need to get it out before I lose my nerve. It probably won't make much sense to you, but for once in your life I need you to shut up and listen because-well, it's important. Got it?"

"Got it."Izzie replied, feeling nervous. She studied the way Callie wrung her hands tightly and knew that she was in for something. "So-"She said, crossing her arms. "-what is it?"

Callie nodded as she cleared her throat. "I know, and you know...and George knows...the whole hospital knows by now everything that's been happening these past few months. I hate it, but it happened and it's in the past. George and I, we're staying together. I know that he probably told you, but we're...we're going to counseling. You know, in an effort to make our marriage work. Because we're happy, but there's this...communication...thing. Anyway-"She said, taking a deep breath.

It was obvious to Izzie that Callie was working up to something, and as she stood watching the women, she couldn't help but feel sorry for her. "Callie?"

Callie nodded again, this time agreeing that she needed to move forward. "I hate that George can talk to you. I hate that he can come to you and the rest of his friends whenever he has a problem, but not to me, his wife. I...can't stand the fact that it always seems like he's putting you before me, that he thinks of how you'll feel before he even begins to think about what it'll do to me. But you weren't the problem, Izzie. You were a big part of it, but it was us-me and George. We weren't talking, I wasn't telling him whenever I was upset. And...while I can't forget that George...slept with you...I can forgive him."She continued, staring Izzie directly in the eye. "Which means that I have to forgive you, too. So..."

"Thank you, Callie."Izzie began, still unsure of how to react. A part of her was relieved that she was making an effort to speak with her while she stood there watching Callie carefully pick her words. "While I can't entirely grasp why you're saying this, I understand. I never set out to hurt you. I mean sure, we've never exactly seen eye to eye, but George...he's always been a friend to me, and I know that he loves you. I'm...glad that you two are working it out."

A silence passed between the two that was filled with a weary awkwardness, but also with understanding. "Okay..well, I have to deliver some X-Rays. I'll see you later?"

Izzie watched as Callie opened the door. "Callie?"

She turned around to watch her as her hand still clung to the doorhandle. "Yeah?"

"I'm sorry. It's so new to say, but-"

"No, it's okay, Stevens. Me, too. Afterall I might be your boss one day...you know, barring Bailey or someone else getting the job. It's better to get everything out of the way."Callie said as she waved the file in her hand. "I've gotta get going."

Looking around the room, Izzie sunk into a nearby chair. It was something she hadn't expected and until then, hadn't realized that she needed.

* * *

The rest of the day went well, Izzie joining Burke in a surgery, and spending lunch with Cristina and Meredith. All the while she couldn't help but wonder where Alex was. The thought hadn't left her mind that she still didn't have the chance to tell him back. Cristina, along with George, were pulled into surgery which left Izzie under Meredith's scrutiny. "What?"She asked, picking at her salad.

"You. You're overly quiet, and when you're quiet, something is usually up."Meredith surmised, leaning against the table. "So?"

"So?"Izzie echoed, looking around the room. "Nothing. Everything, for once-"

"If the next word out of your mouth is fine, Izzie, I swear..."Meredith trailed off, shaking her head.

"No, no. I mean everything's going good. Well, for the most part."Izzie replied, biting her tongue as she did. By the look in Meredith's eyes, Izzie could tell that she wasn't going to let it go. "I slept with Alex last night. I know what you're thinking, so go ahead and tell me I made a mistake, or I'm just going to get my heart broken. But that's what happened. And me? I'm fine...I'm happy."

Meredith watched Izzie, studying the smile she wore. She'd known her long enough to tell when she was lying, and Meredith knew that this wasn't one of them. "Is that the reason you ran out of Joe's last night?"She asked.

Izzie shrugged, a nervous breath escaping her. "Kind of. Look, I'm sorry for dumping all of this on you. I would have told you this morning, but then it didn't seem as important when you were stomping down the hallways away from Derek."

"You heard that? Iz, everything's...well, it's up in the air. But don't change the subject. You...and Alex? Unleashing the beast?"

A red blush crept up on Izzie's cheeks as she stuffed a forkful of food into her mouth. "Not exactly. It-It wasn't like that. It was...we were in the parking lot of Joe's, and he said he loved me...and I kissed him. We were talking, and so he took me home...and it just made sense, Mer. I'm _tired _of keeping myself from doing what I want. The past year has been hard on all of us, and I'd like to think that we can start the new one...fresh."

"Bright and shiny Izzie?"Meredith asked, arching an eyebrow. "Because if it is.."

"No, Mer...this...is just Izzie."She replied with a shrug. "No strings attached."

Meredith nodded, spotting Alex walking down the hall. "Okay then. Well, I'm happy for you. But if he hurts you-well, I'm sure you know the end of that sentence."

* * *

That evening, Alex was headed across the hospital bridge when he looked up to see her. "Hey. Ready to go?"He asked, noting the way she fumbled with her jacket buttons.

"Yeah, sure."Izzie replied with a smile. She watched the way Alex nodded as she tried desperately to collect her thoughts. All day, she'd focused on her patients, but it seemed like any time she had off all she could think of was how they had left things that morning. "Do you wanna go home?"

"Are you okay?"Alex asked, recognizing the wave of anxiety in her eyes. "Is it Hannah? Iz, she'll be here for the next day or two...her doctors are still wrapping up tests. You'll have time to say good-bye."

"I know."Izzie replied, tilting her head as she looked at him. The words fighting in her head couldn't form a sentence, but as she looked at him, they seemed to make sense. "Just...wherever we go...are you hungry?"

Alex stuffed his hand inside his pocket, sighing. "Izzie-"

"I love you. Okay? Because it's been bothering me all day...that I didn't say it back. I wanted to this morning. But then the thing with Meredith and Derek, and then there was work...and I just-"She paused, drawing in a steadying breath. "-I felt like I needed to tell you. God, this is so...not how I planned on doing this. We're uh, we're not perfect people. I get that. But Callie was talking to me this morning, and what she said...it made sense. A lot of things have happened in the past, but I can't...I don't want them to affect my future."

Her words settled upon him, Alex knowing full well the depth of what she was saying.

"So we're good?"Izzie asked, a bright smile on her face.

"Yeah."Alex replied, wrapping his arm tightly around Izzie's shoulder as they headed out. "We're good."


	15. All We Can Do is Live

**Author's Note: This chapter was a little easier to write for me, but it's still sad to see this story ending. After this, there's only one chapter left. If you have any ideas or anything, feel free to let me know. And as always, leave a review! Thanks!**

* * *

Pulling her scrub cap off, Izzie sighed as she proceeded down the hallway. She'd been in surgery for several hours that morning, and she had to admit that starting her day off with a successful one put her in a good mood. Passing several nurses in the hallway, Izzie carefully made her way to the waiting room with Derek trailing behind her. "You know that if you wanted to talk to me or whatever...I mean it's already obvious." 

He smirked, catching up with her. "You did good in there, Doctor Stevens. It's impressive, really."Derek said, nodding. "But it's really that obvious?"

"Are you kidding? The way you kept looking up at me, asking questions during the surgery? Not that it isn't a normal part of the surgical process because clearly it is. But the questions weren't entirely pertaining to a guy with an aneurysm."

Derek nodded, staring down at the tile as they trekked down the hallway. "It's Meredith."Seeing the look Izzie had on her face, he held up his hands in defense. "It's not bad, I swear. I just-I mean you guys are supposed to be choosing your specialties soon."

"And what?"Izzie asked. "You were hoping Mer would go into Neuro?"

"Maybe a little. I was just wondering if maybe she'd mentioned anything to you."He replied, shrugging.

"Casually maybe, but other than that don't you think it would be safer to ask her?"Izzie asked as they reached the waiting room.

Derek paused, looking at her. "True. I guess I was just looking for a different perspective."

Izzie nodded, offering a smile. After everything that had been happening, she understood how talking things through with someone else had to have helped. "Good. So, should you explain what happened, or should I?"

* * *

Meredith slung her bag over her shoulder, taking a moment to sip her coffee before continuing her trek down the hallway. She caught a glimpse of something to her left and doing a double-take, she realized it was Alex. In the gift shop. Amused, Meredith made her way to the doorway. "I didn't see you as the sappy kind, Alex." 

His head snapped up, knowing he'd been caught. "I'm not."

Meredith raised an eyebrow as she walked towards him. "Then what's that?"She asked, pointing to a teddy bear he held in his left hand. "If you need help finding a gift for Iz-"

"It's not what you think."Alex defended.

"Good."Meredith replied, laughing a little. "I mean, I'd help if you were. But uh...not here in the hospital giftshop."

Alex nodded, referencing to the bear. "Hannah's leaving tomorrow, and I wanna you know...give Iz some support."

"Oh."Meredith said, finally understanding. "So the bear is for Hannah then?"

"Yeah. I don't know what a girl her age would want, you know? But Izzie told me she likes cute things, and stuffed things. Well-"Alex said, holding up the bear. "Stuffed. Cute."

Meredith followed him to the register, nodding as she did. "I'm sure she'd like it."

"Hopefully. So, um..."Alex said, waiting patiently in line. "I do need help for something with Izzie, though."

"What's that?"Meredith asked. Just then, beeping erupted from inside her purse, and she knew then that she was being paged. She looked at Alex, who in that moment seemed stressed. "Listen, just um...meet me at lunch. Is everything okay?"She asked, worried.

"Yeah."Alex said, smiling. "I mean, it will be. Now go...answer your page."

* * *

The day passed with certainty; Izzie realizing that Hannah would soon leave the doors of Seattle Grace, and Alex planning a night for her. Both focused on work, Alex was stuck in surgery and Izzie working with several patients. They ran into each other once in the hallway, only to make the casual comment that they'd see each other later. Feeling guilty, he knew that he had to make it up to her-though he didn't know how. With Meredith's help in distracting her, Alex had the time to atleast try and prepare something. 

"Mer, seriously-"Izzie cried as Meredith stopped the car once they reached their driveway. "Something is going on, and I'd like to to what it is."

"We can't go shopping?"Meredith asked, trying her best to act innocent.

"I didn't mind going shopping, but since when would you want to go? And on a Thursday at that?"Izzie asked, still not believing it.

"I just thought that maybe...I don't know, you could use some cheering up?"She asked, pulling the key from the ignition. "Hannah leaves the hospital tomorrow, and I know it's not going to be the easiest thing for you."

Staring out the windshield, Izzie sighed. "Maybe. I don't know, Mer. A month ago it probably would have killed me. Well you know, not literally. But now?"Izzie replied, turning to look at Meredith. A light was there that hadn't been before. "Hannah's happy, Meredith. She has parents who would do anything for her, including allowing me into her life. It's not going to be easy, but eventually it has to happen."

Meredith agreed, and saying goodbye, made an excuse that she had to go see Derek before driving off.

Izzie sighed, carrying her bags up the steps. While she hadn't ended work with the idea of shopping in mind, she was glad to spend the time with Meredith. Opening the door, the smell of food greeted her. "Hello?"She called, setting down her bags as she stepped forward. Gazing around worriedly, Izzie looked up the stairs. "Alex?"

Shuffling was heard before Alex made his way out of the kitchen. "Oh, you're home."

"Yes..."Izzie replied, afraid. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You went shopping with Meredith. Wait-"Alex paused as they met. "Is she still alive?"

Izzie kissed him before nodding. "Surprisingly so. Mer can hold her own."

Alex's arms linked behind her back, pulling her closer. "So I'm sorry about today. I got caught up with Sloan, and the surgery got more complicated than it should have been."

"It's okay, I'm fine."Izzie insisted, and she knew that this time Alex believed her. "So um, can you tell me what that smell is? Because it smells like food."

"Oh, so you're hungry?"Alex asked.

She shrugged, picking a crumb off of his shirt. "Depends. Is there food?...Edible food?"

Alex shrugged, gesturing towards the kitchen. "I uh...I might have a few tricks up my sleeve."

Knowing her bags lying in the hall could wait, Izzie followed him into the kitchen. Pausing before the table, Izzie shook her head in disbelief. "You...did this?"

"Well, you usually do all the romantic stuff. But seeing as it was for you, I couldn't exactly let you in on it."Alex replied, his hands resting against her shoulders. "So, can we eat?"

Izzie sat across from him, staring at her plate. She didn't know how much time Alex had spent, but from the look of the food it had to have been a while. Chicken alfredo, pesto toasts, wine...Izzie lifted her gaze to him, shaking her head. "Why? I mean, I'm not complaining. Ugh, why did I say anything? What I...what I meant was that you know...you never did this before."

"Before?"Alex asked, having to take a moment to realize what she meant. "Oh, well...it's different now. New, better."

Izzie took a bite of her chicken, allowing the taste to flood her mouth. While she wasn't sure how it happened, she realized she'd never felt much happier than she did in that moment. "So tell me Alex...how is it that you managed to get all of this together? I never knew that you could cook."

"I can't do it by myself. I flipped through some of the books you have. You give pretty good directions, Iz."Alex replied, amused with the fact Izzie seemed to enjoy herself.

"Thanks, Alex."Izzie replied, her mouth hidden behind her wine glass. "Good to know I could help."

They finished dinner, talking about the day, and various subjects either happened to bring up. Once the food was pretty much gone, a silence settled in that neither knew how to fill. "So..."

"So-"Izzie said, twirling the three remaining noodles on her plate with a fork. "I guess we should clean up."

"We can sit."Alex replied, knowing it sounded stupid as soon as he said it.

"Sit?"Izzie asked, amused. She laughed, shaking her head.

"You okay?"Alex asked.

Trying to fight laughter, Izzie braced herself against the table. A few seconds passed before she looked back at him. "I'm sorry, it wasn't really that funny. I just..."She paused, taking a deep breath. "I don't know what it is."

Alex frowned in reply, not knowing what she meant.

"I'm happy, Alex. Not just content, or passive...or even pretend happy. Actually decent, hundred percent...okay, maybe not a hundred-"Izzie said, choosing the moment to look into his eyes. "But I am. Partly because of everything you've done, and I don't...I don't know how to thank you."

"You don't have to."Alex said, standing. He watched her do the same before meeting him near the middle of the table. "But really, you're okay? Even with-"

"Alex, I'm okay. The way things were before were getting to me, but they aren't anymore. A year ago, we were all new in medicine, we were confused. We had no idea where the next year would take us, and while it was hectic to say the least, I know that we can never take it back. All we can do is live."

Alex leaned in to kiss her, his hands combing through her hair. Allowing his lips to linger, he wanted Izzie to know. He wanted to assure her that no matter what they went through, he'd be there. Alex knew she was right in the fact that they had to live. Sitting by idly was no longer an option for anyone now that they'd soon be residents.Feeling the need for air, Alex grazed Izzie's bottom lip with his tongue before pulling back reluctantly. "So you're living now?"

Izzie shrugged, leaning her forehead against his. "I guess that's the right word for it. So, I'm going to just-well, I'm going up to take a shower. You're gonna clean up?"

"I thought I was dressed nice enough?"Alex asked, grinning.

"You know what I mean."Izzie replied, kissing his quickly before trying to pull away. She felt Alex's hands pulling on her wrist and turned back to see what he wanted. "Alex?"She asked after he didn't say anything.

"I'll be up soon."Alex said, unable to say anything else.

Izzie nodded, a faint smile crossing her lips. "I guess I'll leave the door unlocked then. Oh, and I bought a new shampoo."She said, kissing him again.

Alex laughed, loving it when Izzie tried to be unpredictable. "I can't wait."

* * *

**The ending line for Alex seemed a little off to me, but I needed something that wasn't cheesy or sappy or-well, you get the picture. Anyway, the next chapter is the last one; though I might do an epilogue if enough people ask for one. I've got a few ideas floating around, so let me know. Leave a review, please!**


	16. Slow and Steady

**Author's Note: This is kind of sad, seeing as it is the last chapter. However, I did decide to do an epilogue. I'm pretty sure you'll like that as well so just sit tight for now. Hannah is in this chapter more than she has been because obviously...she's leaving SGH. Anyway, without rambling on for too long, please leave a review!**

* * *

"Meredith!"Izzie called, knocking loudly on the bathroom door. "Come on, I need to get ready for work and you're taking forever."She continued, sighing as she knocked again. 

"What are you Meredith-ing for?"Meredith asked from behind her. Rubbing her eyes, she herself felt tired that morning. "Who's in there?"

Izzie turned around, offering a smile. "Oh, sorry. See I um...well, I thought you were in there."

"Since when do I have long hair and McNickname everything?"Alex asked, leaning against the frame of the bathroom door. He laughed at Izzie's obvious embarrassment before walking towards them.

"You aren't Meredith."Izzie said, taking in the sight of Alex in nothing but a pair of old pajama pants. "Um, so I'll just...well, uh-"Izzie said, pointing the the bathroom.

Meredith looked back and forth between what was now the closed bathroom door and Alex. "Is she okay?"

"Honestly?"Alex asked. "She's Izzie."

* * *

Izzie and Alex chose to ride together to work, and as they were getting out, Izzie stared in confusion at the object Alex held in his hand. "What's that for?"She asked. 

Holding up a gift bag that held the bear he'd bought for Hannah, Alex shrugged. "We were gonna do that whole party thing for Hannah. I just thought that maybe I could bring something."

Izzie's eyes misted over as she walked towards him. "Thank you."She said, offering a faint smile. "Can I see it?"

"Easy there-"Alex said, holding the bag away from her grasp. "You'll have to wait, too. Come on, let's go."

They walked together into the hospital trying to stay occupied for the time being. Izzie would be with Derek again that day due to a follow up surgery with their patient, and Alex would be with Burke. They met again at lunchtime, though it was fleeting as only fifteen minutes later both were paged due to a car accident coming in from the highway. The day carried on, Alex focused steadily on what he was doing while Izzie was slowly succumbing to the reality that Hannah would soon be leaving.

Alex caught her standing by her locker as everyone was leaving, and walked over. "Hey...you sure you wanna do this?"

Izzie's head popped up and she nodded. "Yeah, I have to. Well, I don't really have to, but I feel like I do. She's my daughter; biologically, anyway. I shouldn't be sad about the fact that she's leaving the hospital."

Alex ran a comforting hand up her arm, because he knew that moment would come. "Iz, everything will work out. Just because Hannah's leaving doesn't mean that she'll be out of your life. There are ways to keep in contact if both of you want. You guys could write each other like penpals or something. Or, if her parents say that it's fine then maybe you could stop by for a visit every once in a while. She's a strong girl, Iz. Just like you."

Izzie nodded, smiling sadly at the last part he'd said. "I'm not strong, Alex. I'm the way that I am because of you. You-you've helped me every step of the way. I probably wouldn't have even made it one step into Hannah's room if it weren't for you."

"You know what? I don't think that's true."Alex shot back. "At least not with the Izzie Stevens I know. Because she doesn't back down from something she wants. If she falls down, she gets back up...she's not afraid to admit that she needs help." It seemed like with every new thing he came up with, Alex constantly kept thinking of more. "You aren't who you are because of me. You've always been you...through all of this. But you're better now. You're-You're stronger now, Iz."Alex continued, stopping briefly to let the moment sink in. "You wanna know what else? Alex thinks Izzie can get through this."

A bright smile erupted from Izzie's face, and she realized in that moment just how much she loved him. "You know what?"She asked. "Izzie thinks Alex is right."

"Alex thinks that's a good idea."Alex replied, moving a tendril of hair that had fallen out of place back behind Izzie's ear. She looked beautiful. Even with tear stained, reddened eyes, Izzie still looking amazing to him. The strong, determined look in her eyes was enough to tell him that she'd be okay through all of this. "So...can Alex kiss Izzie now?"

"Izzie..."Izzie began, leaning in closer to him. "Izzie has to think about that. But Izzie knows that she loves Alex."

"That's definitely good to hear."Alex replied, linking his arms around her. "Because Alex loves Izzie."He managed to whisper before Izzie took his lips into hers, silently vowing that whatever happened, they'd stay together. In that moment, Alex felt his knees weaken as Izzie's hand roamed underneath his shirt. He fought back to urge to gasp as the electricity he felt in that moment. He had somehow managed to position Izzie's back against the lockers, and carefully pulling away, he planted a kiss softly against her collar bone.

Izzie looked up at him, desperately trying to gain control of her breath. "So."She whispered, nodding.

Alex leaned in, planting a soft kiss against her lips. Looking back into her eyes, he wanted nothing more in that moment than to hold her. Still, he knew that in any moment another wave of people would come in to leave for the day. He offered a quiet nod as they left the locker room.

* * *

Standing outside Hannah's room, Izzie stared at the family sitting inside. She thought for a minute of what it would have been like had she been a part of it. She thought about what would have happened had she kept Hannah, had she chosen to stay in the trailer park. So many things had changed for her, and Izzie knew that there was no real way to tell. Feeling Alex standing next to her, Izzie knew that she couldn't wait forever. As she saw a few nurses, of whom dealt with Hannah while she was there, walked up she knew that it was time. It wasn't until she heard the voice of one Miranda Bailey did she think to turn around. 

"I figured I'd find you here."Bailey said, knowing what Izzie was about to go through. "I probably shouldn't go in, but I wanted to be here...it's tough to see a child go."

Izzie nodded, shifting the plate of muffins she'd made for Hannah. "I know it is, and I guess it always will be. But I'm glad Hannah gets to go home. I'm sure she'll be much more comfortable there. Besides-"Izzie said, taking a second to look at Alex. "-we'll stay in contact. You know, if she wants to. It's up to her now."

"Izzie Stevens..."Bailey said, trying to find something else to say. "I'm-well, frankly, I'm proud of you. Out of all my interns this year, I'd say you were the one who grew the most."She said before looking at Alex. "No offense, Karev."

Alex nodded, smiling. "None taken, Doctor Bailey."

"Yeah, everything's-"Izzie looked up, her mouth momentarily hanging open. Standing in the hallway, a few mere feet away, was George. She straightened up and nodded. "It's better now."

Bailey seemed to sense George standing behind her, and after saying good bye was on her way.

Alex looked at George before looking back at Izzie. "You know I um...well, we parked farther away today. I'm just gonna go park a little closer. It is started to pour out there. I'll be right back"

Izzie nodded gratefully, giving his hand a squeeze before watching him leave. "I wasn't sure if I'd see you here."

George sighed, staring at his shoes. "I just thought that maybe you needed people. I haven't been able to find you all day, so I thought it was okay to come."

"Thanks, George."Izzie replied, racking her mind for something else to say. She watched as he stared back at her, knowing inside that he was desperately trying to make an effort. "So, uh...have you chosen your specialty?"

"What?"George asked, not expecting the question.

"Specialty. What you'll do for the rest of your career?"Izzie asked, biting her lips as she was afraid she would be stepping over the line.

"Oh. Not yet. I'm-I'm thinking about it. I'm still deciding."He said, nodding as he stuck his hand into his pocket. "What about you?"

"I haven't decided."

George nodded, looking around. "So, are you gonna go in?"He asked.

"Yeah, I'm just waiting for Alex. We were going to give her a little going away thing."Izzie replied. "You could-"

"No, it's fine. I should-"George said, looking at his watch. "Callie and me are supposed to meet up for dinner. I just wanted to make sure...you know, that everything was okay."

"Good. Everything's good."Izzie replied, nodding. She could tell that George was trying, and knew that it was a good sign. "I'll see you tomorrow, George."She said, waving as she watched him leave.

* * *

Alex was back within minutes, and with him, Izzie walked into Hannah's room. She watched for a minute as the nurses handed Hannah her own smaller pair of scrubs. Excited, Hannah said she'd try them on as soon as she got home. Izzie smiled, happy that she could enjoy herself.

When it was time for Izzie to give Hannah what she'd made, Alex chose to step back, because he knew she needed a moment.

"Thanks, Izzie. What kind are they?"Hannah asked, taking the plate and setting it beside her.

"There's a few flavors. Blueberry, strawberry, apple-cinnamon...oh, and for dessert-"Izzie said, leaning in to whisper. "Chocolate chip."

Hannah's eyes lit up as she smiled. "Yum. Mom, can I have one now?"

Izzie laughed, looking at the woman in the corner. "I'm sorry. I guess I should have waited."

"Oh no, it's fine."She insisted. "Hannah sweetie, let's wait until after you eat dinner."

"Okay."Hannah said, trying to fight a yawn.

"You're tired, huh?"Izzie asked, offering a smile. "Well, I guess I won't stay too long, then. But before I go...is there anything you want to know? I mean, I know this whole thing is probably still confusing for you, so if you ever wanna know, just ask your mom...or your dad. They should probably be able to help you."

"Isobel..."Came the motherly voice. Izzie felt a hand on her shoulder, and knew there was something coming.

"Just a minute, Hannah."Izzie assured her.

Safe in the corner, Izzie felt a fresh wave of panic wash over her. What if she was wrong? What if she'd be cut out of her daughter's life? What if?

"I know my husband already spoke with you, but...I wanted to thank you. I know you weren't exactly expecting this when it happened. Hannah's spirits were really lifted when she came in after seeing you. I hope that in the future...maybe you could talk with her more?"She asked, afraid of the answer she'd get. "I mean, if you wanted to. When she's older."

Izzie smiled, relief coming back to her. "Of course."She said. "I'd love to."

When they returned, Alex was still standing back. Seeing Izzie wave him over, he nodded.

"Hannah? This is Alex...I know you've met him before, but you know...incase you forgot. Anyway, he wanted to...give you something, too."Izzie said, realizing then that she had no idea what it was. She had hoped that at least it would be something she'd like.

Hannah took the bag, and pulling out a bear, took on a look of surprise. "How did you know?"She asked excitedly.

Alex shrugged, looking at Izzie. "Lucky guess. You like it?"

"Yeah, it's pretty."Hannah replied.

"Hannah, what do we say?"Her father reminded her.

"Thanks, Alex."Hannah said, offering a grin as she pressed the stomach of the bear and it began to play 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow.'

Izzie nodded, nudging Alex in the arm. How was it that Alex always knew what to do?

Time passed quicker than anyone realized, and before long the doctor came in to officially release Hannah. Izzie watched as she was placed in a wheelchair as she was still too weak, and she the pictures were taken off of the walls so she could take them with her. Quietly, she'd handed her address to Hannah's father, as to avoid any awkwardness when finally saying good bye.

Standing in the center of the room, Izzie leaned down to give Hannah a hug. "Bye, Hannah."She whispered, tears threatening to fall.

"Bye, Izzie."Hannah said as they pulled back. "I'll miss you."

Izzie nodded, trying to control her tears. "I'll miss you too, Hannah. But don't worry, we'll talk."She said, and afterwards bidded them all a safe trip home before watching them leave for the last time. She stood still in her spot, not really sure of where to go. In the short time Hannah had been at Seattle Grace, she'd made a permanent place in her heart; one that wouldn't go away.

Alex shuffled his feet as he walked up next to her. Studying her face, Alex tried to determine how she was feeling. She seemed tight, tired even. Still, as he wrapped his arms tightly around her, Alex knew somehow that she'd be better. "Izzie?"

"I just..I need a second. I'm okay."Izzie said, turning to face him. "Really."

"I know."He whispered. "Take the time you need, Iz. I'm here."

She laid her head against his shoulder, taking a deep breath. "She's really gone."Izzie said as Alex securely placed her against him. "But you know what?"

"What's that?"Alex asked as felt Izzie pull back.

Izzie thought of everything that happened, of how far she'd come in just the short time Hannah had been there at the hospital. Every step of the way, Alex had been there for her. He didn't judge, or scream, or pretend like everything was okay when it wasn't. Something had changed between them other than what had already been addressed, and as she stared into his eyes, Izzie knew that Alex was in it for good. "We'll be okay."

"We'll be okay."

"Come on, let's go home."Izzie said, walking with him to the door. "Hey Alex?"She said once they were safe in the elevator.

"Hey Izzie?"Came Alex's reply.

Izzie grinned, feeling safer than she'd ever been when she was with him. "Izzie thinks it's okay for Alex to kiss her now."

"Does she?"Alex asked, happy for the reprieve. They'd talk about it more in the morning, but for now he was glad Izzie felt like she could be herself. "I thought you'd never ask."

"Well, what do you know?"Izzie said, watching as Alex steadily leaned in. He'd changed, as had she. Though they were still the same people, both had grown together. "Sometimes people surprise you."


	17. Feels Like Home

**Author's Note: So here we are with the Epilogue. I'd like to thank those of you who have read and reviewed so far. This fic began as something to sort of bring me out of a block, along with the reality that despite being a fan of Azzie-I've never really done a story for them. Anyway, please leave me review...come on-one last one?**

**For those who want to know, the title comes from the beautiful song by Chantal Kreviazuk, "Feels Like Home."**

**Azzie fluff ensues...**

* * *

**Epilogue/Feels Like Home**

Izzie stood before the full-length mirror, smoothing her hair down as she gazed. She turned towards Meredith, trying her best to draw in a steadying breath. "It's okay, right? That I feel nervous."

"Of course."Meredith assured her again, offering a smile. "Just don't do that giggle snort thing you did earlier during the ceremony, and I'm sure you'll be fine."

Izzie nodded, clearly taking Meredith's comments to heart. "It's crazy, isn't it? I mean, a year ago...a year ago, Alex and I-"She shook her head, trying to keep her emotions in check. "And now we're getting married. Married."

"Okay, Iz. I agreed to be a bridesmaid, I didn't think giving you CPR would come with it."Meredith replied, placing a calming hand againt her shoulder. "You-You aren't having second thoughts, are you?"

"No."Izzie answered immediately. "Of course not. I'm sorry Mer, it's just-"She shook head head as tears misted her eyes.

"It's a big day."Meredith replied, consequently finishing Izzie's sentence.

Offering a smile, Izzie nodded. "It is, isn't it?"She said, taking a glance up to the ceiling. "Okay, so...vows, rings...reception."She said, making a checklist of things she had to look forward to. Alex had managed to keep where they were going afterward a secret, but she was sure he knew her well enough to pick a place they both would love. A smile graced her face as Izzie stared back at her reflection in the mirror. Her dress was strapless and smooth, a beaded design at the waist, and it flowed down to the floor in a way that only resulted in making it appear more beautiful. Her hair was, for the most part, held up by pins, though a few tendrils hung loosely to frame her face.

A soft knock came at the door before Cristina came walking through. "Okay, so everyone is pretty much in place. Do we need anything else?"

"Nope, I think I'm good to go."Izzie said, nodding. She took a steadying breath, shaking her head. Closing her eyes momentarily, Izzie thought of what she'd planned to tell Alex once she reached the altar. It was nice, she thought. After everything they had been through a year before, she realized how much she loved him, and a few months later Alex proposed. She agreed, and the planning began. Though at times Cristina seemed less excited about it, both she and Meredith agreed to be bridesmaids.

Another knock came, and as Cristina went to check she sighed. "You're here to hit on a bridesmaid?...Mer-"She said, waving towards the door. "McDreamy's here."

"Actually, I'm here to make sure everything's ready."Derek said, stepping quietly inside. "Do you have the rings?"

"Right here-"Izzie said, picking them up off of the desk. "-don't lose those."

"I know. I'm quite aware of the fact that I will be killed if I do."Derek said, sending a wink in Meredith's direction. "So, I guess my job is to get these to their proper place and head up to the altar to join Alex. I'll see you out there."

"Derek?"Meredith asked, waiting tentatively near the door. When he turned around, Meredith smiled, nodding.

"Cut it out you two, this day...is about me. Okay? Well, me and Alex. Okay, so Derek...you go do what you're supposed to while we finish up here. Two minutes."Izzie said, feeling the need to take control on the situation.

Once he left, Meredith looked curiously around the room. "Is everything okay, Iz?"She asked.

"Yeah, everything's good. I just wanted to-"Izzie replied, offering a shrug. "Thank you guys. I know that neither of you were really that thrilled about going to look at dresses, and taste cake and things like that. But you knew that I was. So...thank you for putting up with me."

"As long as you're happy."Meredith insisted, knowing that they needed to go.

The music began as they slowly walked down the aisle, Meredith and Cristina in front of Izzie the whole way. The church was filled with people both Alex and Izzie knew, as they figured it would be best that way. Standing as Alex's side was Derek, because he had been the one who talked the anxiety out of him when he went to buy Izzie's ring. Through the whole planning of the ceremony, Derek had managed to keep Alex sane, because while he loved Izzie, he had eventually given in and let her plan the whole ordeal.

Standing in front of Alex, Izzie saw everything that she knew she wanted in his eyes. While the both heard the priest talking, they were mainly focused on each other. "I understand that the both of you have written vows for each other?"He asked, looking directly at them. When both nodded, he returned the favor before looking at Izzie.

She smiled at Alex, holding his hand tightly. "Alex...I'm not really sure there's a word that describes how I feel for you. It's just-it's amazing. You have been there for me...always. Whenever I needed you, however I needed you, you've been there. You see me as who I am, and not this person that I try to be. Faults, secrets, injuries aside...you love me. While I admit that at times the idea scares me, I've grown into the idea of completely accepting someone as they are. I want to do that for you. I want to be the person that you can come to, unload everything on, regardless of what it is. I want to be the person you confide in, the hand that you can hold. I know it probably seems a little corny, but that's how I honestly feel. So with honesty, and with love...I promise that I'll do all of that for you. Because you accept me, Isobel "Izzie" Stevens...baggage, history, friends and all. You have seen me at my highest points...and at me lowest. Still you love and accept me."Izzie smiled, eyes misted over with tears. "I want you to know that I accept you the same way, too. I love you."

Alex took a second to gain composure, and drew a deep breath before speaking. "You know if someone would have told me a year ago that we'd be standing here today, I'm not sure if I'd believe them. Not because I don't want to, but because I wanted to so badly. I've had to work for anything I'd ever gotten, and I knew that making you see how much I loved you wouldn't exactly be an easy task either. Still, somehow it happened. I love you, Izzie. I know that it's taken us a while to finally realize just what that means, but I'm glad that we did. You're...you're different than anyone I've ever really known. At work, at home...a lot of people have trouble separating the two. You on the other hand haven't. I want you to know that I don't just see one side, or love one side. Because I see you for who you are, just as I'm sure you see me. I promise that while it won't be easy, I'll be there for you every step of the way. We'll work through things together, get through everything together. I promise you that I'll be there for you-sickness, health...through all the good and bad times. Regardless. Because I'm in love with you, Isobel Stevens."

By that moment, tears were flowing freely from Izzie's eyes. She listened to the priest's words, and knew that she had to repeat them. "With this ring-"She began as she slid the ring on Alex's finger. "I thee wed."

Alex took his ring, and nodded his head slightly as he held Izzie's hand. He could feel it shaking, and gave it a squeeze. "With this ring-"He said, repeating the same movement Izzie had just done. "I thee wed."

"Perfect. Now, by the power vested in me by the great state of Washington, I pronounce you husband and wife."The priest said, adding a smile. "Kiss the bride."

Alex grinned, pulling Izzie close. Clapping erupted from the pews, but he was too lost in the moment to notice. When he pulled back, he caught a gleam in Izzie's eyes, and could tell how happy she was. "Hi."He said, at a loss to say anything else.

"We're married."Izzie said, allowing the moment to wash over her.

Alex nodded, grasping her hands in his. Lost in her eyes, Alex was sure he could never feel happier.

* * *

Izzie danced comfortably in Alex's arms that night, still coming to terms with the idea that she was finally his wife. "What you said earlier...it was beautiful."

"Yeah, well...I was just being honest."Alex said, a blush creeping onto his cheeks.

"I know. But now there's a church full of people who know you have a soft side."Izzie joked, laughing. "Does it bother you?"

"Bother me?"Alex asked, shrugging as they danced. He took a moment to glance down at his shoes, knowing the risk of accidentally stepping on hers. "Not one bit."He assured her.

Izzie's gaze softened, lost in listening to the song, and feeling Alex's arms around her. Before she realized it, dancing had momentarily ceased so they could at least attempt to eat. They were sitting at their table when she felt Alex tap on her arm. She turned towards him, curious. "Yes?"

Alex grew a little uncomfortable as he hoped they'd have a quieter moment so he could give her something. He waited until the majority of their guests had gone out to the floor to dance in some sort of group collaboration. His hand slid towards hers, handing Izzie an envelope. "I know it probably could have waited, but I felt like maybe you'd want to read it."

She saw her name scrawled on the front of a rose pink envelope. "Who's it from?"

"Iz?"Alex asked, waving towards the envelope.

Knowing she had to, Izzie tore it open. A card that had a red bouquet of roses in the front with big cursive letters read 'Congratulations'. Curious, Izzie opened it up. A few moments later she looked back up at Alex, again with tears in her eyes. "Alex, how did you-"

"The last time we went to visit. Her dad gave it to me just before we left. Hannah wanted me to give it to you."Alex answered, hoping he hadn't upset her.

Izzie set it down, leaning in towards him. "Thank you."She whispered. Izzie's arms remained tightly around him until the crowd had parted, somewhat encouraging them to get out on the floor again. "Ready to try dancing again, Karev?"

Alex grinned as he helped her stand. "Sure thing, Karev. But I don't dance alone."

Izzie looked at Alex as they walked lazily out onto the dance floor. What Alex had said greeted her differently than she expected it to. Karev. Izzie Karev. As in Alex's wife. A smile graced her lips as she rested her head gently against his shoulder. She felt safe, secure, and knew that now she'd never have to dance-nevermind anything else-alone ever again. She lifted her head and looked around at the other couples who danced freely along with them. Meredith and Derek stood still, arms wrapped tightly around one another. Burke and Cristina were trying to attempt dancing, a thought that brought a laugh. The Chief was talking with Bailey in a corner, yet seemed to be doing a dance of his own. She hesitated a second when her eyes landed on George and Callie, but noted how happy they seemed to be. They went to a counselor, and had managed to save their marriage.

"Izzie?"Alex asked, noting how quiet she seemed.

She looked back at Alex, and it was then that everything clicked with her. She heard the lyrics of the song playing, and for her it seemed to make so much sense. Alex had opened up his heart to her, just as she opened hers for him. From that moment, nothing could get in the way of the bond that just they shared. Everything they had been through together only served to make them stronger. "Alex?"She asked in return.

"I guess you want to know where we're going after all of this, don't you?"Alex asked, knowing Izzie was genuinely curious.

"Do you want to tell me?"She asked.

"I want to, but I know that I can't. You'll find out soon enough."Alex said, grinning. "You trust me, don't you?"

Izzie swayed in Alex's arms, comfortable with who they both were and where they were going. It didn't matter where they were going, because she knew she'd always have him. "Of course I do, Alex. I always have..."She answered, complete honesty shining in her eyes. "And I always will."


End file.
